


The ABCs of Closet Case Hanamura

by sutera



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Angst, Comedy, Fluff, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Non-Chronological, One Shot Collection, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance, bc yosuke orz lkasjf, dumb things, occasionally bc i can't live w/o angst, so fukin ghey, souji being souji tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-10
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-04-08 15:04:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4309791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sutera/pseuds/sutera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yosuke repeatedly tries to convince himself that he's not gay for Souji. Souji doesn't help at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ankle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yosuke crashes his bike again. Souji's not too happy about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have become souyo trash. pls slay me.

Yosuke really, _really_ hopes no one finds him.

The Samegawa river bank is thankfully void of people, so that means no one saw Yosuke crash his bike in a _completely_ embarrassing fashion right into the rocks. It’s happened often enough that Yosuke _should_ just be able to get up and walk it off, but this time… well, let’s just say he needs a few minutes to recuperate. Or maybe an hour.

He ends up lying down on the grass, his ruined bike sprawled next to him. Sad reflection is all he can do right now, short of calling for help. He doesn’t wanna deal with an irate dad, nor does he wanna bother Souji (because really, Souji’s the only one who’d be able to help him out of everyone else, but Yosuke’s sure he’s hanging out with Chie at the moment), so instead, he decides to dwell on the mundane things to pass time.

Probably a bad plan, considering how he won’t be moving for a while, but hey—it’s nice to lie down and think for a while, right? Not that he’s doing it by choice, though…

His thoughts drift to the excitement of the past few days. He really needs to ace that motorbike exam so he can actually ride a _real_ motorcycle and attract some _sweet_ girls. That way, he won’t look as dumb if he ever crashed. Well, actually, it’d still be pretty dumb, but people would be fussing over him rather than laughing, right?

Even as he thinks that, he makes a face at himself. That was a pathetic thought to have.

Groaning aloud, he eyes the setting sun. It’ll be dark soon, and he’ll be stuck at night-time here. Unless he wants to limp home, which would probably consist of a lot of bitching, but he supposes there’s no other option _but_ that for now. Ugh, but that means he has to leave his bike here…

He side-eyes the contraption. Okay, maybe it’s not going anywhere anytime soon.

“I wish I was in the TV world right now.” He moans. At least _there_ he’ll be able to heal himself. A good old Dia would be nice, considering it has healed far worse than what he has right now. And what he _has_ is a painful throb at his ankle, one that indicates he’s probably sprained it. Otherwise, his nerves wouldn’t be screaming in agony when he shifts his foot the slightest bit.

Sighing, he’s about to resign himself to calling his dad—who’s probably at work right now and _really_ busy—to pick him up, but a voice interrupts him.

“Is your bike okay?”

A soft shadow falls over his body, and Yosuke squints against the fading light to see a familiar face. He opens his mouth to voice a query, but what's said registers and it throws him off with feigned annoyance.

“Aw, c’mon.” Yosuke groans, throwing an arm over his eyes. “Not that again, partner.”

“Sorry.” Yosuke can hear the grin Souji’s voice. “I can’t help it.”

There’s a shuffle, but Yosuke can’t be bothered seeing what the other does next. Maybe Souji’ll go away and leave him to his pity party. At the same time, Yosuke’s tempted to whine for his help. Yeah, that sounds like a better option than bugging his dad at this busy hour.

“It’s a lucky thing that we’re getting our licenses soon.” Suddenly, Souji’s voice is nearer to Yosuke than he expects, and he almost jumps up, startled—until he remembers that his ankle is currently in a _horrendous_ condition but before he can stop himself, he’s moved his foot a few inches. Freezing immediately at the pain, he whimpers quietly and settles back onto the grass heavily. Arm off his face now, he squeezes his eyes shut against the sharp look of concern Souji shoots him.

“Yosuke?” The worry in his voice is palpable.

“Just leave me.” Yosuke moans aloud. “I’ll die valiantly here.” Okay, _maybe_ he’s being overdramatic, but he’s a little unsettled by how concerned Souji is over him. It’s just a sprained ankle. Yosuke’s not _dying_ or anything. Still, he’s sorta enjoying the attention.

“Yosuke.” Souji says once again in a sterner tone. A sigh, then a query. “Where does it hurt?”

Yosuke cracks open an eye and finds Souji sitting right beside him. Huh, no wonder he sounded so close before.

“Don’t worry about it, partner.” Yosuke says, and mentally berates himself. Hadn’t he _just_ been thinking to ask the other for help? Well, too late now. Maybe he can drag himself home after Souji leaves.

Except Souji’s not leaving. In fact, the guy’s got that calculative face on, the face when he’s studying too hard or when he’s trying to work out a tactical manoeuvre against a particularly nasty Shadow. Analytical and sharp. Yosuke finds it interesting to look at.

And so he does, since Souji is currently occupied scanning the rest of his body to notice. That gaze is coming closer and closer to the area of pain, and Yosuke gives a small, half-hearted punch to Souji’s knee, the closest limb he can reach from his lying down position.

“Oi, knock it off.” Yosuke says. Souji doesn’t need to worry about this. Then again, Yosuke wants him to, so the fact that it’s actually happening makes it kinda hard to push the other away. “I’ll be fine. I just needa rest for a bit.”

Souji doesn’t answer him for a while, and Yosuke sighs. Well, better show him that Yosuke really _is_ okay, right? He honestly doubts the wellbeing of his ankle right now, but he needs to test it out anyways to see if he’s actually rested it enough.

Souji happens to beat him to the punch.

It’s just the barest, feathery movement upon his shin when a hand brushes a pant leg up. Yosuke sees it too, only vaguely concerned about what Souji is doing (and he _swears_ he’s not overly occupied by Souji’s _face_ of all things), but becomes _immediately_ aware as soon as a firm _prod_ is given and—

“ _OW_!” Yosuke swears aloud, and makes to jerk back his leg away from the offending finger that Souji is holding out. However, Souji catches on quickly and he’s pressing a hand down Yosuke’s thigh to prevent him from moving. That’s _probably_ a good thing, since Yosuke would’ve hurt himself more, but right now the only thing on his mind is the overall _pain_ throbbing through the entirety of his being and it’s all because of _Souji_.

“What’d you do that for?!” Yosuke hisses. Okay, _maybe_ he’s showing his dramatic side again but damn it, that _hurt_. Souji looks at him for a moment, deadpan once more, and gives another poke. A flash of pain shoots up his system once more, and Yosuke swats him away. “ _Ow_. Can you not?!”

“So you crashed your bike again.” Souji comments, looking back to the injured limb; Yosuke looks too, and scowls when he sees the inflamed skin. Well, _now_ it’s looking bad. Not that Yosuke actually checked before, but he could’ve lived without seeing that.

“I thought we established that already.” He grumbles. He sits up now, though he doesn’t move his legs considering Souji’s practically _lying_ on one of them. That’s kinda weird, though. Souji’s never been the guy to do the ‘touchy-feely’ thing; at least, Yosuke _thinks_ so. Huffing, he crosses his arms. Right. He’s supposed to be mad. “Look, it ain’t that bad, okay?”

“You’ve never sprained your ankle when crashing your bike before.” Souji goes on as if he hasn’t heard a word Yosuke has said.

Rolling his eyes, he decides to play along. “Your point?”

Souji’s quiet when he finally answers.

“It could’ve been worse, you know?”

Yosuke goes silent. Then becomes embarrassed. “That’s a weird thing to say.” He says, laughing weakly to shrug it off. A hand goes to the nape of his neck nervously when it doesn’t work as well as he plans when Souji looks at him once more, steel greys unreadable. Inwardly, Yosuke groans. He’s in for some kind of lecture, he can tell already.

“Yosuke…” Souji plays with his name in his mouth, it seems, as if he’s trying to digest something. _Probably something nasty_ , Yosuke guesses as Souji becomes more agitated by the second. “When you fall off your bike, you don’t know what angle you’ll be falling off at.”

He starts to see where this is going. He doesn’t like it, though. “That doesn’t matter.” He finally says when he can’t bear to keep looking at Souji’s unwavering gaze. His raised arm comes back down, and his hands fidget together instead in a different expression of nervousness. The concern radiating from the other is kinda scaring him now.

"Yes it does." Souji's voice is sharp all of a sudden, and Yosuke flinches instinctively, not liking where this is heading. Souji seems to realise this, as the perfect being he is, and those glaring eyes soften slightly. "What if you landed on your arm? It would get broken. You wouldn't be able to come into the TV for a significant amount of weeks."

When that registers, Yosuke opens his mouth, his nerves thinning to annoyance instead at the reprimand he's getting because okay, he gets it now. Can Souji lay off? Skip the lecture that Yosuke knows is coming? Because he honestly _doesn’t_ want to hear it, whether or not Souji is right.

However, Souji butts in with a tone that flattens the more he talks.

"What if you landed on your back and hurt it? You wouldn't be able to move, and since no one is here, no one can help you."

"Okay, I get it." Yosuke mutters, finally voicing his irritation. "Can we just—"

"Or." Souji interrupts him shortly with an unreadable expression. "What if you landed on your neck? Those rocks aren't soft. You'd die instantly."

Yosuke goes silent.

What the hell is he supposed to say to that? And why's Souji so concerned anyways? He's not Yosuke’s mom, nor is Yosuke his responsibility. But…

Damn it. Even as he's thinking it, it's hard to admit. Souji's right, as usual. Yosuke’s always falling off his bike. What's to say he won't fall off the wrong way? Just one brush of bad luck and...

Ugh. He doesn't want to think about it anymore.

"You really know how to kill a mood, yanno?" Yosuke mutters. His arms cross once more and he's unintentionally hunching into himself. He doesn't like this shame, as if he's just a careless child.

"I'm just worried." Souji says in a neutral voice, with an equally neutral expression. He doesn’t know what to make of it.

"You don't need to be." But Yosuke grows quiet when the other leans away from him to an absurdly large bag that he hadn't noticed before. Wait, what was Souji gonna do here anyway?

After voicing this question aloud, Souji waves him off with one hand idly whilst the other digs into the bag. "Just fishing."

"Dude." Yosuke feels guilty now, and he sits up straighter. "You don't have to--"

"You're more important, though." Souji interrupts firmly, gives him an even firmer _look_ , and he falls silent. Seemingly content with his lack of answer, Souji leans back towards him with a newly acquired object that he puts to the side before Yosuke can see it. Before he can inquire about it, there’s a gentle yet precise touch at his ankle, the touch cool against the inflamed skin. Yosuke tries to refrain from flinching away from the touch, but it’s not so bad as the visuals look. Souji manages to work off his shoe and the sock accompanying it. Souji tucks them to the side and, inwardly, Yosuke winces because _surely_ his foot must smell. Coupled with the fact that it’s becoming more swollen by the minute, it must look _disgusting_.

But there Souji is, handling his ankle tenderly, careful not to treat it with the same violence (he’s exaggerating a little, but Yosuke denies that) as before. There’s no disgust or anything like that on those features; just that same, soft concern Souji first regarded him with.

Damn it. As if Souji wasn’t already perfect.

And even if Yosuke starts to feel the faint ebbs of jealousy gnaw at him, there’s something else swimming beneath the surface too. Something he can’t really identify.

Before he can really delve into it, however, he zooms in on the object that Souji got out earlier. Gauze. Gauze that Souji is now using to wrap neatly around his ankle to secure it.

"You brought a first-aid kit to a fishing session." Yosuke states in disbelief.

Souji gives him a long look. "You never know when you need it." Then there's another, pointed look at Yosuke’s ankle. The message is pretty clear.

"Okay, _fine_." It’s a one-in-a-million chance to be honest, but Yosuke leans back and lets the other do what he wants. He casts his mind for something else to say when the silence extends uncomfortably long, but after a while Yosuke realizes he's the only one uncomfortable here; Souji seems to be completely at ease when he finally finishes the tight wrapping with a pin despite the quietude that'd descended. Yosuke wonders whether that’s related to why he doesn’t talk much either. Then he wonders why he’s so damn curious. And anxious. And just—this is his _partner_ , okay? Yosuke shouldn’t be freaking out this much, if at _all_.

Apparently, he needn’t be so antsy. Souji leans back with a satisfied smile, which quickly turns into a smirk when he looks to Yosuke.

“Done.” Souji says lightly. Then—“I should be your personal nurse.”

“I-you _what_?!” Yosuke flusters immediately, embarrassed at the very _thought_ of the image of Souji in a nurse’s outfit. And not a guy’s one. A _girl’s_ one. And somehow Souji looks nice in it despite the—okay, okay. _Calm down, Yosuke._ _Souji may look nice but he’s a bro, he’s a_ bro _—_

Fuck his thoughts right now. Fuck Souji _too_ for playing tricks on him.

He starts to scowl, mouth opening to berate the other—because damn it, Souji should _not_ be allowed to suggest those kinda things to him—but Souji speaks up before he can. “I was joking.”

Yosuke groans. Of _course_ he knows he’s joking—why _wouldn’t_ Souji be joking? But that little smirk is still present on Souji’s face, and Yosuke’s thoughts go wild until they become completely incoherent. Maybe he should just—skip over the matter completely.

“You can go fish now.”  Yosuke says, giving him a glare before fixating his gaze on the nearby river. “ _Please_.” He adds, almost like an afterthought. He has the feeling that the other will probably continue with his dumb jokes until Yosuke goes insane.

“You don’t want me to nurse you back to health?” Souji seems to give him a mock-hurt look.

“Ugh. _No_.” Yosuke moans. “How the hell would you ‘nurse’ me, anyway? Actually—“ He quickly backtracks when he catches a flash of opportunity within Souji’s eyes. “—Nevermind. Please don’t think about that.”

Souji gives what seems to be the most miniscule pout ever. “Yosuke…”

Fuck. This is gonna be a long night of recovery.

“Yosuke, I need to tell you the nurse puns I’ve thought of.” Souji fishes through his bag— _no_ pun intended, thanks—and then brings out a _book_ of all things. A book titled ‘ ** _bear_** _y good puns_ ’.

He starts to scream internally.

Yeah. This is _definitely_ gonna be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gurgles these two are just so lkjsaf lies down lkjasf 
> 
> but uh thank you for taking the time to read!!! i really do appreciate it!! please leave a kudos and/or comment if you enjoyed.
> 
> have a lovely day!!


	2. banana

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Souji's sucking on a banana. Yosuke has no idea how to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slay me now

In retrospect, Yosuke should’ve seen this coming.

 _Or would that be ‘cumming’?_ Suggests an incredibly traitorous part of his mind, and Yosuke barely manages to stop himself from banging his head against the table. No, no he can’t do that. Otherwise the others would be alerted to something suspicious going on. And there’s _nothing_ going on. Nothing at _all_.

It’s just that. Souji won’t. Stop. Looking. At. Him.

Yeah, Yosuke would be fine with that normally. Yosuke would be _completely_ fine with his partner looking at him because maybe Souji is zoning out and happened to focus on Yosuke as he does so. That happens to people a lot. There’s no mistake about that. Yosuke does it too on occasion.

S-so Souji _must_ be doing that right now. He _must_ be. Because there is _no way in hell_ that Souji is _eating a goddamn **banana** while looking at him_.

God. It sounds so freaking _bad_ in Yosuke’s mind. Maybe he’s just overreacting. Maybe Souji’s weirdness has gotten to him. Just—something must be happening. _Anything_ must be happening because _this_ can’t be.

“The beach is supposed to be a calm place, isn’t it? That’s what you tell yourself, anyway.” Yukiko’s saying in a hushed voice. Her arms are spread, a manic grin spread across her lips. Everyone else has varying reactions, but Yosuke’s a bit more terrified at how Souji is currently looking at him. And eating that banana. That goddamn banana.

 _This is just a hangout._ Yosuke thinks to himself desperately, tearing his gaze once again away from Souji who is _very_ persistent in gaining his attention as well as doing _obscene_ things with that _tongue_ —

 _This is a group thing. Everyone’s here and we’re all hanging out._ Yosuke’s almost _wheezing_ with the effort of blocking out that burning gaze. _Yukiko’s being her usual self and scaring everyone shitless and Chie’s trying to get her to stop and-and Teddie’s cowering u-under the table—_

“Oof!”

Speaking of.

It’s Teddie, of course, under the table. Someone probably kicked him by accident.

“It’s night. There’s no reason for you to be scared, but you are. The waves are calm, the moonlight glints off the ocean surface. But then… something catches your eye.” Yukiko’s continues, seemingly enjoying herself _thoroughly_. Apparently, she doesn’t notice that everyone else isn’t.

“Wh-what happens next?” Naoto tries to put on a brave face. She’s doing far better than the others at this point, despite the white knuckles wrapped around her soda.

“Y-yeah!” Yosuke says loudly (and maybe _too_ eagerly because Chie’s casting him an incredulous look). “What happens?”

Souji’s not looking at him. Souji’s _not_ looking at him. He isn’t, right? Yosuke risks a glance, and freezes.

Yes, Souji is looking at him. And he’s gripping his banana at the base while a tongue slowly laps at the head. The pink, wet muscle is teasing, almost _erotic_ in its dance and then Souji shifts, licking a straight line up from the base of the banana to the very tip and Souji is _still fucking looking at him_ —

Gulping, Yosuke turns back to Yukiko, tries to ignore the _very_ strange heat bubbling at his core. This is not happening. This is _not_ fucking happening. Why the hell hasn’t Souji taken a bite from it already?! It’s not… it’s not fun just _licking_ it, right?

Yukiko’s eyes are glittering when Yosuke forces himself to focus on her once again. Her gaze sweeps among the group, and she seems triumphant about her captive audience. “Well... you become curious of course, despite your fear. A strange pattern in the water, like a flower.” Yukiko’s voice drops to a whisper and almost everyone except Souji and Yosuke lean forward in horrified anticipation. “A black one, but… as you approach, you realise something. It’s not a flower, you think. It’s nothing _like_ a flower, because flowers aren’t supposed to look like _hair_ …”

“H-hair?” Rise stiffens, clinging to the closest person—which happened to be Souji. However, she doesn’t seem to realise _what_ the guy’s doing, unlike Yosuke. “But that’s natural, isn’t it?” She starts to shake Souji—who _thankfully_ pauses in his ministrations (but damn it, only ‘cause everyone else is turning to look)—, a wild yet also pleading look in her eyes as she beseeches Yukiko. “I-I mean everyone swims in the beach, so it’s natural that a few hairs would come loose, right?!”

"Oh, but it's not just a few." Yukiko’s says serenely. The fixation is on her once more,  and Yosuke chances a glance at Souji. Of course, his partner is doing _that_ thing again. That weird banana thing. Hahaha, yeah, must be a trend or something. A very _weird_ new trend that Souji's gotten himself hooked on.

Not willing to keep looking for more than a millisecond—because he _swears_ Souji just fucking _bobbed_ a little—Yosuke stiffly turns back to Yukiko as she continues. "It's a _mass_ of hair, and it flows so ethereally, you think. It’s so beautiful that you forget how scared you are, so you take a step towards the water, if only to satiate the query burning within your mind."

"But I don't wanna go near the water!" There comes Teddie's trembling voice from under the table (Yosuke forgets why he’s even down there in the _first_ place); following it is a sharp yelp from Kanji.

"Oi! Don't bite my ankle!" The blond yells, ducking his head awkwardly under the table. Apparently, this starts a chain reaction of curiosity. Everyone else takes a peek under the table, and Yosuke face palms from the idiocy of it.

"Teddie! Get the hell away from me!" Chie. And Yosuke assumes she lashes out with a kick because there's a high-pitched whine.

"B-but Chie, your legs are so nice and muscular! How can I not look at them so closely?"

Yosuke sighs aloud and lets his hand fall from his face. He's about to tell them all to knock it off—because he can _really_ feel them now nudging at his legs (and it’s probably by accident, like they're playing footsies with their hands and _heads_ or something)—but he freezes the second his gaze goes wandering.

Right at Souji. Who is fucking _deep_ - _throating_ now.

At least, that's what it looks like. Yosuke can't really think of anything else, because Souji is... _really_ into it. His mouth is spread around the fruit, those steel grey eyes _smouldering_ as they fixate solely on Yosuke, and Yosuke _thinks_ he sees a slight bump in his throat from the shape; there’s a shift as those cheeks hollow out and Souji moves—up, down. Up. _Down_.

Damn it. Damn it _damnit—_ how the _hell_ does Souji keep such a straight face while d-doing _that_?! And-and why’s he doing it in the first place _anyways_ —

The more and more this goes on—the more Yosuke _stares_ at Souji because he somehow can’t rip his gaze away—, the more he feels both mortification and something _else_ build in him because-because even though Souji’s shamelessly doing that _here_ of all places, it’s kinda… it’s kinda…

Fuck. Fuck this. He is _not_ cool with this, he’s _not_ —

He freaks out.

“Argh—!“ Yosuke stands suddenly, eyes wild and his fingers tug at the ends of his hair. Everyone freezes at the same time, but Souji is—Souji is still fucking _going_ — “C-cut it out!!” He yells.

Apparently, that gives a few people a shock. He vaguely hears a few bumps and curses—probably Teddie, Kanji, and Rise judging from the tones—, and the table jolts unceremoniously suggesting they might’ve bumped their heads.

Thankfully, though—and _finally_ —Souji stops in his ministrations, and Yosuke prays inwardly that that’s the end of that. But then he watches as Souji slowly pulls the banana out of his mouth—and fuck fuck is that _saliva_ hanging from his lips?!—and pauses at the tip.  Yosuke’s quickly starting to regret _prolonging_ his gaze on his partner (really, he should’ve looked away as soon as Souji was _seemingly_ gonna _stop_ ) because it’s _now_ that Souji sinks his teeth into the head of the banana, and starts to chew on it. And Souji— _goddamn Souji_ —does it with such a goddamn _innocent_ expression, as if he’d been intending to do that all along.

Then, Souji reaches for the nearby napkins, wipes his lips, and just smiles at Yosuke.

Yosuke can’t help but gape.

 _The_ hell _is he playing at?!_

But then racing thoughts are interrupted by a smear of crimson on the corner of his vision, and Yosuke manages to gather himself enough to swallow hard and not look so stupid. Yukiko has popped out first, and she squints up at Yosuke, as if she’s gotten too used to the lack of light under the table (with _at least_ several other people blocking any other light with their goddamn heads and legs and—Yosuke can’t tell for the _life_ of him on what they were _doing_ down there exactly but it was probably something _really_ dumb).

But Yukiko’s just curious, if a bit flushed from ducking down so long. “Did you want me to continue?”

Pause. Yosuke opens his mouth to answer, but nothing comes out. His mind’s currently whirring at insane levels, and he keeps flashing back to the ridiculous image of Souji _deep-throating a goddamn banana_.

“D-do you really think Yosuke would be eager for you to?” Naoto asks, seemingly a little bitter as she emerges, rubbing her head. She probably hit it too, though in a quieter fashion.

Kanji almost up-ends the table when he wrenches himself out of the small space. He seems flushed, embarrassed by something, and he stands immediately. “I—“ He starts to declare, but his face goes _completely_ red (and was that a bit of _blood_ near his nose?) when his gaze lands on Naoto and Naoto, alerted by the movement and noise, looks back up at him.

“I NEED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!!” Kanji shouts before making a mad dash for the exit— _definitely_ not the bathroom, Yosuke notes distantly.

“What’s up with him?” Chie asks, already stretching on the bench; Teddie manages to slink up beside her, looking disturbingly happy for whatever reason.

Rise rests her elbows on the table, her chin on the palms of her hands. She’s sighing softly, but there’s a mischievous smirk on her face. “I think Kanji-kun accidentally got a good view…” A giggle, then a wink as a fingers points to Naoto, then to under the table.

Immediately understanding, Naoto’s eyes widen, face turning beet red. “Y-you are not serious…” She utters, terrified.

“I think Yosuke could use a good view once in a while.” Souji suddenly says in that terribly calm voice and everyone swivels to stare at him. Souji seems comfortable, though, and continues without missing a beat. “But… I guess he’s already witnessed one.”

There’s a strangled, dying noise in Yosuke’s throat.

“I, uhm—“ Yosuke chokes, clears his throat loudly. When did it get so damn _hot_? And why—damn it. Souji _knows_ what he’s doing, he damn well _knows_. Time to book it. He _refuses_ to let the others see him fluster so much, least of all _Souji_. “I-I should go check on Kanji! Y-yeah!”

And without further ado, he _leaps_ from his bench and disappears after the blond.

Afterwards, Chie casts a long look at Souji. “Should I even ask what’s up with _him_?”

Souji smiles.

“I have no clue.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so like-- i should've probably mentioned this before but there's no fixed timeline to these chapters. all of them are in non-chronological order, meaning that they'll take place in random parts of the year and can stand alone by themselves. there's no fixed plot over a course of chapters unless i specifically say so.
> 
> anyhow, i hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! ljsalkjf i'm a little touched at the reception the first one has gotten, so i hope i'm doing you guys justice!! thanks for leaving kudos and comments! i really do appreciate !! ; ^ ;


	3. cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yosuke finds out Souji's cat obsession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why has no one slain me

Souji likes cats.

It takes a moment for Yosuke to comprehend the thought before it’s finally sinking in, then it takes another moment for him to actually process the fact that Souji has been out here, in front of his own house, petting a _cat_ for what seems to be _at least four hours now_. Or maybe Yosuke’s exaggerating, but he’s pretty damn sure, after parting ways with Souji at his house after a huge ‘steakout’ at Aiya’s, that that cat had been waiting for Souji and whatever godforsaken hunk of meat— _fish_ , his mind supplies, but he stubbornly ignores it—that Souji would provide it with.

Honestly, Yosuke hadn’t thought much about it then—his belly was full and he’d been aching to just collapse in bed—but he realises that Souji’s uncle might’ve owned a cat he’s never seen before. That, or Souji has been taking strays home…

Wait, wait. Yosuke shakes his head, trying to keep his mind on track. Yeah, he’s certain that it’s been _at least_ three hours—maybe he _was_ exaggerating before—since he’s dropped Souji off because… he tries to calculate it in his head. They made it to Aiya’s at four, spent two hours there, and after walking Souji home—which was _totally_ not gay, okay? Partners walked each other home!—Yosuke made it back to his house at six thirty. Then after _that_ , Yosuke mucked around for at least an hour or two before realizing he’d left his music player with Souji and ran back in the dark to retrieve it.

And here they are now. At nine or so in the evening. And Souji’s still petting that damned cat after feeding it.

Damn it. Now his head hurts. He shouldn’t be thinking _this_ hard about it. Actually, he shouldn’t even be so surprised. It’s just Souji and a cat. A cat that apparently can spend more time with Souji than Yosuke can. Even though Yosuke is Souji’s partner.

“Argh!” Yosuke runs a hand through his own hair, a little frustrated at his _own_ frustration over this. What the heck is wrong with him?

“Yosuke?”

He jumps at the sound of Souji’s voice, and immediately he feels his face flush from embarrassment. He’d been standing there like an idiot without really saying anything to Souji to announce his presence, and now he probably seems like a real dumbass…

“Oh, uh, hey.” He manages to get out, clearing his throat. He shuffles awkwardly before realising his own movements and he shoves his hands into his pockets, trying to appear cool. He’s not panicking. He’s not. Why would he be?

“You’re back early.” Souji comments; there’s a hint of curiosity within his usual impassivity but he’s stopped petting the cat. Actually—where’d the cat go? Yosuke _swore_ it’d been there— “You scared it off.” Souji says next, as if reading his thoughts. Amusement graces his lips then, a miniscule change in expression that, after spending so much time with him, Yosuke can recognize. At least he isn’t mad that Yosuke’s chased off the feline.

“Sorry.” Yosuke says quickly. He crosses his arms instead, feeling a little _too_ jumpy for his own tastes. Maybe it’s the run over here. After finding out he’d lost his music player, he’s not gonna deny how much adrenaline is running through his body at the panic of it all. There’s _no_ way he can survive without it. “I didn’t realise how much you liked cats.”

Souji’s brows furrow a little then—at least, Yosuke _guesses_ they do because of how those lips turn down—and he seems confused. “What do you mean?”

This guy gets stranger every day, Yosuke swears. “… You do realise you’ve been stroking that cat’s fur for almost three hours now, right? I mean, they’re _soft_ , I can get that, but, uh… that’s kinda weird.”

There’s that blank visage again, something that somehow radiates both innocence and _mischievousness_ at the same time. “Is that a problem?”

“Wh-what?” Yosuke raises his hands, eyes widening. “No! But… you’ve been petting that cat for _three hours_. Might be a bit obsessive there, partner.”

“Hmm…” Souji appears to think about it. Yosuke doesn’t know whether he’s joking or not, but the next words confirms that he _is_. “… Are you _jealous_ , Yosuke?”

Yosuke thinks he chokes for a bit. “N-no!!” He resists the urge to face palm. Loudly. Though that doesn’t stop the flush from getting deeper on his neck and cheeks. And his heart is beating fast too. Damn it, that didn’t imply anything! “What the heck goes through your head, honestly?! I-I was just—you know what, nevermind.” He scowls, crossing his arms.

Souji snickers then, a breathy sort of laugh that Yosuke doesn’t know what to make of. It’s endearing, though. Not that Yosuke’s gonna say anything about that. Or even _acknowledge_ that, actually.

However, Souji doesn’t speak, and already sorta used to that, Yosuke’s continuing on, huffing at his current situation. “Look, I’m just here for my player, okay? Is that too much to ask?”

“And here I thought you came back because you enjoy my company.” Souji says with the most serious expression ever, and he even has the _gall_ to look upset. Yosuke already knows it’s a farce; it just makes him wanna strangle the guy more.

And kiss him.

 _Wait, no!_ Yosuke’s a little horrified at his own thoughts, and he fights the urge to let that show. No, no, nonono _no_. He meant… he meant like… like _bro_ -smooching, he’s sure. Yeah. That’s what he thought. What he wants. It’s platonic. Completely something bros do. Something partners do. Yeah.

Just, dammit. Why do Souji’s lips look so _nice_? Why does _Souji_ have to look so nice? _Be_ so nice? And funny. And fucking attractive. And just— _perfect_ —

Yosuke halts his train of thought right there.

“Alright.” Souji finally says, and Yosuke beats himself up inwardly upon realizing how silent he’d gone. Embarrassment gnaws at his insides once more, but Yosuke manages to beat the feeling down.  He gets out the player from his pocket. “Thanks for letting me look at it.”

Yosuke honestly already forgot the reason why he handed it over in the first place. Was that all? He doesn’t think he’d forget to get it back after Souji just _looking_ at it. He wasn’t _that_ distracted at the diner, was he?

“Yeah, sure.” Yosuke mutters, and as he takes it, Souji’s hand moves very slightly, fingers lingering on Yosuke’s own for longer than necessary. Eyes widening, Yosuke’s jerks his hand back and he almost yells about it until his gaze catches Souji’s. Perfectly impassive once more, not betraying a hint of emotion; Yosuke _swears_ the guy likes to play with him.  Trying to suppress his flustered state, he connects his headphones to the device before shoving it in his pocket once more.

“I should use it as ransom next time.” Souji says thoughtfully.

Yosuke kinda doesn’t want to find out. His mouth decides to ask for him. “…What for?”

“To have you over here for more than a few hours.” Then Souji actually _winks_ , nice and slow and _suggestive_. Souji doesn’t fucking _wink_. He _can’t_ fucking wink especially when he’s so damn _deadpan_ at the same time and he can’t be saying—

“Maybe even overnight.”

Yosuke stares.

 _What… does he mean by_ that _?_ Already, he feels that previous flush coming back, spreading up his neck to his cheeks and he ducks away, both irritated and embarrassed once more.

“W-would you quit that?” He snaps out, not really sure how to handle _that_ , of all things. Sure, it’s not like Souji _hasn’t_ done anything like… _that_ before—Yosuke _refuses_ to refer to it by name—, similar to when they were at the Group Date Café, but hearing it makes him squirm. He flushes harder, if possible, even as he tries to regain his composure.  “B-besides, if I stayed over at your house, we might wake up Nanako!”

Even as he says it, Yosuke freezes. _Wake up Nanako?! From doing_ what _?!_

“I-I mean—!” Yosuke hastily tries to amend his words and curses Souji inwardly when a faint smirk starts to show on his face. _Shut up shut up shut up_ — “W-we’d be mucking around and-and your uncle won’t be happy about that! Just— shut up.” He finally ends with a scowl.

When Souji starts to chuckle, Yosuke decides it’s time to book it. There is _no way_ he is gonna prolong this just to give himself further opportunities to embarrass himself.

“Okay, well, thanks.” He says shortly, crossing his arms. His posture is a little stiffer than he likes it to be, but right now he’d rather not suffer from any more of Souji’s jokes. “I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow at school.”

At first, he doesn’t think Souji will reply, and he decides to turn and walk away. Yet before he takes even his fifth step, there’s a faint call after him, one that makes him pick up the speed in flustered irritation.

“I’ll introduce you to my cats next time!”

 _Cats?_ Plural _?!_

Yosuke groans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> urk a shorter chapter this time but of course i had to use the cats somewhere lkasjf and the fish thing as well i guess omg laskfjl thanks so much for reading and leaving kudos/comments!!!!! ; ^ ;
> 
> next chapter: a quiet little talk on the riverbank (and an 'almost' confession).


	4. dirt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A moment that could've been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need some slaying

The grass feels nice under him.

He’s breathing in hard, harsh gasps, almost in tandem with Souji who’s lying next to him, and it’s kinda nice despite the blows they’ve delivered to each other just mere moments ago, despite the bruise that Yosuke can feel forming upon his cheek. He runs his tongue across his still-jittery teeth, the bottom layer, and feels a bit of blood accompanying the saliva found there. Yeah, feels about right.

“Phew.” He finally lets out a louder sigh, and closes his eyes to the midday sun. “We really gave it our all, didn’t we?”

A chuckle is heard from beside him. “We should probably fight in the TV world next time.”

Yosuke snorts, and then winces when that disrupts a sore section of his nose. “Yeah, probably. Would’ve saved questions from the others _and_ we could’ve had a quicker recovery. A good old Diarama would’ve done the trick, huh?” He pauses, briefly, before continuing. “I feel like Chie will beat me up even more if she ever knew about this.”

“Then let’s not tell her.” Souji replies simply, but there’s amusement in his tone.

“Mm.” Yosuke gives a small noise of agreement. “So as an excuse for our bruises, should I say that I took you for a bicycle ride?”

“… That _would_ explain everything, wouldn’t it?” Souji asks, seemingly _contemplating_ the idea. Yosuke can’t really tell from his expression—he doesn’t want to open his eyes just yet, after all; he’s way too comfortable with the sunrays beating down on his body and eyelids—and neither can Yosuke tell from Souji’s voice. The guy can do a _mean_ poker face, after all.

“Hey, c’mon, partner!” His complaints aren’t enough to drown out the laugh from Souji’s end, no matter how soft it is. “Jeez, I guess that’s true, though. No one’s got faith in me, huh?”

And he meant that entirely as a joke too until Souji’s laughter fades, and there’s an almost solemn note in his voice when he speaks next.

“I do.”

 There’s sudden warmth blossoming in Yosuke’s chest at the admission and he forces out a laugh to try to lessen the sudden sobriety that has fallen upon them. He doesn’t like this. They were alright just a second ago, and Yosuke hates that he has to ruin it with some self-deprecating comment, even if it is a joke. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t believe it any less though, and maybe that’s what Souji already knows.

“Of course you do! You’re my partner, after all.” Yosuke grins then, and cracks open an eye to peek at Souji. The other male is seemingly peaceful, lying there with his eyes closed like Yosuke before, but Souji’s a little closer than he expects. Not that it bothers him or anything, but Yosuke’d been the first to collapse, hadn’t he? Had Souji purposely laid this close to him when settling himself down? Or maybe Yosuke’s just looking too much into things—that certainly wouldn’t be the _first_ time but-but damn, why would he even care about that?

He tries to scrub his mind clean of those thoughts.

“Yes, but…” Souji doesn’t seem to buy it immediately. Steel grey eyes are revealed and they stare, not straight at Yosuke as he expects, but instead up at the sky. “You said it yourself, didn’t you? As we go along life, we become special to people, and they become special to us. And… all of us, not just me… we all think you’re special, Yosuke. We all have your back, and we all have faith that you have ours, too.”

For a moment, Yosuke can’t really respond. He hadn’t expected the sudden spiel, almost certain that the whole mushiness between them was over already, but… he’s glad to hear it, glad to hear that coming from Souji’s lips at _all_. On some level, he’s aware that the team, the _family_ they’ve gathered along this journey, has created a wholesome bond that’ll last a _lifetime_ —because there’s nothing better than a murder case that involves fighting otherworldly monsters to save the day to bring people together, right?—and he can never be more grateful for this sorta thing happening to him.

So why… why does it feel like he’s deflating a little?

Souji just comforted him, tried to reassure him on the underlying insecurities that he has but… Yosuke’s not really feeling it. No, he already _knows_ the truth of what Souji’s saying but—there’s something _else_ he wants to hear, too. Something more personal, something from Souji _himself_ and why… why he said ‘I do’ so confidently and without hesitation.

It bothers Yosuke on a level he doesn’t want to acknowledge, and so he doesn’t.

“Thanks, partner.” Yosuke says quietly, and averts his eyes before closing them once more. He doesn’t know what else to say, but then he doesn’t really wanna say anything more in case this sinking feeling in his stomach shows too much and he’d be forced to book it before he can really enjoy this time with Souji. So instead, he stays silent, and searches furtively with his mind for a change of subject.

He doesn’t know how long they go without speaking, but he’s vaguely aware of Souji shifting slightly. He doesn’t open his eyes to look, but instead feels himself tense more and more by the second. It’s almost painful, just thinking about this and that and what Souji himself must be thinking, because surely Yosuke must seem suspicious for saying so little in response. But… even so, Souji would’ve said something by now, right?

Yet when a sound comes from Souji’s mouth, the start of a sentence that rings heavily on the first two syllables, Yosuke freezes.

“Yosuke…” Souji begins, and Yosuke tries to unwind himself to actually _listen_ because Souji seems serious, and Souji means business when he’s _serious_ serious. “What you said before… about me being special to you…”

Yosuke forces himself to stay still and answer instead of bolting for the hills. “Yeah?” He still feels embarrassed for saying that aloud, because even _he_ doesn’t know what he meant by that. All he knows is that Souji is his partner, his equal… someone Yosuke can’t imagine life without.

“I know you explained yourself, but I wanted to know… whether _I_ meant… to you…” Souji’s voice hitches, and Yosuke’s eyes open wide upon hearing that.

What is… Souji saying?

God, hold on— Yosuke is reading him all wrong. He thought Souji was just being serious and calm at the same time but… there’s something else there that Yosuke hadn’t identified, and still _can’t_ but he can tell that Souji is nervous. It’s a little thing that Yosuke’s picked up on—a faint tremor underlying Souji’s tone that gives away the tremble of the person underneath—, that Souji isn’t just ‘Mr. Perfect’ but a guy who can and does make mistakes too, and is actually afraid of making them.

So… maybe Souji’s afraid to ask this too, and Yosuke tries to keep his calm. He hadn’t heard all of what Souji’d said exactly, because he’d begun to trail off near the end of his sentence. It’d descended into mumbling, and Yosuke wasn’t certain on one of the words. But… he can get the gist of it.

Souji wants to know why Yosuke thinks he’s special to him. Why Souji _himself_ is special. Well, that’s obvious, isn’t it? They’re partners.

However, Yosuke has the feeling even that answer won’t satisfy Souji. But… really, it’s the only answer he has at the moment.

 _Liar_. Something whispers in the back of his mind, but Yosuke doesn’t pay heed to it.

"You're my best friend, Souji." Yosuke says then, and pretends not to see the subtle flinch from Souji (because he doesn't _want_ to see that, he _can't_ see that; he's afraid). "You're special to me because... you saw the ugly side of me. You're the only one out of the whole team. And you accepted me... you never thought I was a pain in the ass or anything like that." Yosuke gives a sudden, nervous laugh. "At least, I don't think you do."

"I think you're amazing." Souji suddenly says, and there’s an utterly genuine undertone.

Yosuke balks. He hadn't expected that. To know that Souji thinks that... but why does his voice sound so small all of a sudden? Then— Yosuke wants to smack himself in the face as he realizes something.  Here Souji is telling him this kinda stuff, and Yosuke is focusing only on what Souji's done for him instead of what exactly makes him special, not just to Yosuke,  but to everyone. If Souji's upset because of that, then Yosuke... should've realised immediately. After all, hadn’t he _just_ been feeling the same way? Souji just happens to have a little more guts to ask for it personally.

"Sorry, partner." Yosuke laughs again, and it's as thin as his previous one. He runs a hand through his hair, trying to calm himself down—from what? He asks himself, but he doesn't have an answer--and tries to respond. "I... that was selfish, wasn't it?"

Souji makes a noise, as if he's about to protest, but Yosuke continues hurriedly before he can. "Look, we don't all say it enough, Souji. Least of all me. I guess we're so involved in our own problems that we forget you can have some too."

"It's not like that." Souji says quietly, but Yosuke shakes his head despite both their gazes directed skyward.

"It is." Yosuke says. He hopes Souji gets that. "It really is. And it's not fair because..." _You're perfect, you're kind and strong and funny at the same time. You're smart and there's no reason for anyone to not like you. You have an amazing smile, and..._ but Yosuke doesn't say it aloud, the words catching in his throat. Instead, he swallows hard, and says something else.

"Because you deserve everything." It's not as elaborate, it doesn't communicate everything he wants to say because everything he wants to say may be too much, and Yosuke doesn't even know why that is. He hates himself for that, and forces himself to continue. "I've... never met a more selfless person. You help everyone and I just think... that's really cool." He gives another weak laugh. "It's not something I could ever do, so that's why I really admire you. You're everything I wish I could be, but I'm not."

Damn it, too wordy? Did he sound jealous? He tries to remedy that. "I-I mean I'm not jealous! Not anymore, anyway. But I just think you're a really swell guy and... and partner." Okay, not as smooth as the speech in his head, but he hopes Souji gets it.

But Souji's silent for a moment, and Yosuke twitches, not daring to look over in case that made everything awkward. Did he go too far? Or maybe not far enough-- not that Yosuke wants to. He feels like... he feels like that's enough, surely, because any more than that...

"Thank you, Yosuke." There's a smile in Souji's voice, and Yosuke dares to look over. His partner is still in the same position, still looking up to the sky. Yosuke starts to relax.

"Yeah." He breathes out, clears his throat. "Yeah, sure."

"But..." Souji follows up unexpectedly. "You have your own talents as well, you know?"

 _Not as much as you._ Yosuke thinks, but it's not thought unkindly. He appreciates the sentiment, and coming from Souji himself, it's a great thing to hear. And Souji has also said he was amazing. Yosuke’s ego can't get enough of that. 

“Yeah, I know.” Yosuke decides to leave it at that, otherwise it’ll probably turn into some kinda back-and-forth compliment thing which is not something he wanna gets into right now, if ever. And he _really_ doesn’t wanna think on _why_ that is exactly.

They both lapse into silence once more, and this is a silence Yosuke is a bit more comfortable with. Here, he doesn’t have to think, to delve wildly into his mind looking for a subject to pick up on to talk about. Here, there’s just… quietude and him and Souji with the faint sounds of the river ahead of them, and the far-away yelling of children playing on the floodplain. Yosuke closes his eyes once more, and doesn’t think much of the rustle of grass beside him.

His mind wanders.

 _We’re close_ , he thinks distantly as he notes the brightness of the sun through his lids, _Souji’s right next to me… his hand is probably nice. Wonder what it feels like…_ Without his knowledge, a smile curves his lips at the thought. Then an image of Aiya’s steak bowl pops up in his head, and he can almost feel himself salivate. _What I wouldn’t give for that right now_. _Souji and I should go there, if he has time and we can hang out some more or maybe he’s got that daycare job to go to again—huh, he seems like the family kinda guy, I guess. What with his brotherly stuff towards Nanako… ugh, Nanako’s too adorable. Other kids are way too rowdy but she’s way too precious. Souji might want a kid in the future… his wife would be lucky_.

His last thought makes him clam up inside. Suddenly, there’s an inconceivable rush of pure _feeling_ in Yosuke (emotions that he can’t even _begin_ to pinpoint), and his eyes fly open and he immediately turns his head to look at Souji beside him, just to make sure he’s still _there_ and yeah, he _knows_ that’s a pretty silly notion to have—

He finds Souji looking straight at him.

In an instant, the world freezes. Yosuke feels his cheeks flush with heat, having been caught eagerly looking at Souji because what would Souji think? But then Yosuke realises that Souji’d been looking at him _first_ and in the time that it takes for Yosuke to process this and look away again with a stuttered cough, he realises that Souji had been smiling. A kinda… _wistful_ smile, kinda at peace and calm and _happy_ at the same time.

And Souji’s gaze had been focused entirely on Yosuke.

“Ah, sorry.” Souji says quietly after a few painful seconds, and Yosuke dares to glance at him again. His partner is looking away now, that smile having turned embarrassed, which is a miracle in and of itself. Souji seems to be a guy of kept-togetherness, someone who can’t be phased, but apparently… whatever _that_ was, it’d really frazzled him. There’s even a tint of red peeking from under Souji’s chin, too, like he’s… like he’s _blushing_.

Flushing even more at the realization of this—at the realization of _Souji_ realizing he’d been caught and subsequently feeling _shy_ about it—Yosuke struggles to rein in his assumptions. Maybe Souji just happened to be looking at him or something while thinking about a funny situation? Souji can’t be smiling like that while looking at _Yosuke_.

It’s only after a few moments that Souji looks back at him, expression bordering on confusion now, and Yosuke realizes he hasn’t responded yet. Swallowing, he gives a nervous grin, to which Souji seems to relax marginally at, the redness seemingly receding from his features.

“Y-your gaze wandered, huh?” Yosuke asks, almost tripping over his own words. There’s nothing else to this. There really _isn’t_ , he’s sure.

But Souji seems to deflate a little at that. Yosuke wonders if he’s imagining things now.

“Yes.” Souji finally confirms, that previous smile fading now (a smile Yosuke wants to bring back _immediately_ , if he’s being honest) to his usual blank expression. “It did.”

“Huh.” Yosuke gives a small noise, unable to think of anything else to say after that. It goes silent once more between them, and it’s that awkward silence again, the one where Yosuke’s uncomfortable and trying in vain to find some kind of topic to change to and rant about.  What’s distracting him, however, is the fact that Souji still happens to be _staring_ at him while Yosuke tries to stare at anything _but_ him.

The longer and longer this goes on, the more riled Yosuke becomes. Just when he thinks he might just leave (because this is getting _hella_ awkward), he feels a sudden touch upon his cheek.

At first, he jerks in surprise, not entirely _expecting_ such light contact. Then when he realises that it’s o course _Souji_ touching him on the cheek with a swivel of his neck, the surprise turns to pure shock and Yosuke can’t help but gape.

Souji’s propped up on the elbow closest to Yosuke, his other arm used to reach out in the first place. Upon perceiving the sudden reaction, Souji freezes momentarily. His eyes are a little wide, as if he hadn’t expected such a reaction, and his mouth is parted too. This close to him, Yosuke can see so _much_ , _notice_ so much and there’s this little nagging feeling in his stomach that won’t go away when Souji leans forward once more.

With a snap, Yosuke manages to shut his mouth, hoping that’ll prevent him from looking so dumb in front of the other. But then he has to question _why_ he’s letting this go on further than it is because Souji seems to take this as an invitation, eyes becoming _softer_ with each passing second, initial embarrassment finally leaking from his cheeks.

Then, the pad of a coarse digit—his index finger, Yosuke notes with a small fluster—taps lightly against the corner of Yosuke’s mouth before the palm shifts, resting all five now upon his cheek; Yosuke can’t help but twitch slightly because the area is way too sensitive for him _not_ to, due to their recent brawl. But then— Souji’s _caressing_ his _face_ , Yosuke realises, and inwardly starts to freak out. The hysteria rises within him, while another part _fiercely_ wants to lean forward and just—just do _something_ because this feels nice, this feels _really_ nice with Souji right there in front of him, his partner’s gaze focused somewhere below Yosuke’s eyes, maybe his nose or chin or-or _mouth_ whilst his thumb traces a course along his cheekbone, light and feathery and _coarse_ all at once—

Souji retreats.

For a moment, all Yosuke can do is blink, feeling like he’s been woken from a daydream. It’s as if that literally never happened, and Yosuke can easily convince itself it _didn’t_ but then Souji’s leaning back—something in Yosuke whines at that—with the hand that’d been cupping his cheek lifted in a showy gesture. Momentarily forgetting the current situation, Yosuke zooms in on that instead, finding a speck of contrast against the lightness of Souji’s finger.

“You had some dirt on your face.” Souji says softly. His forefinger and thumb brush together, wiping away any trace that Souji had touched Yosuke on the cheek in the first place.

“D-dirt?” Yosuke echoes, his voice dry and croaky. He feels disappointed. He doesn’t know why.

But Souji smiles, and that horrid feeling in his chest seems to melt away. “Yeah.” He murmurs, and settles himself back down on the grass. “Must’ve been from when we were fighting.”

“Play fighting.” Yosuke amends, almost absently, but he too transfers his gaze back to the sky. The sun’s setting now, streaking the blue with a vivid orange. He still feels a soft touch upon his cheek, and wonders why his heart is hammering so hard inside of his chest— _and_ why he wants to feel it _again_.

Souji snorts aloud next to him. “My face isn’t agreeing with that.” He teases. “You punch hard… partner.”

Admittedly, Yosuke grins upon hearing that, so much so that he feels his jaw ache. He’s glad for the topic change, but there’s something both curious and _painful_ in him at the fact that he can’t make neither himself nor _Souji_ , more importantly, pursue what the heck just happened then. On some level, he wants it to _be_ something to pursue but on another level—the _surface_ level—he finds the previous hysteria rising in defence, screaming _against_ that course of action.

It might be something that he wants deep down, but he’s… he can’t acknowledge it. He won’t.

So maybe… maybe he’ll have to settle for just this.

“I guess we might have to do some explaining to do to the rest of the team, huh?” Yosuke asks light-heartedly.

“I have the feeling Chie might respond with a vicious kick to your balls.” Souji responds dryly.

They settle with familiar banter, and Yosuke thinks he feels some of the pain in his chest lift.

Yeah, he can settle with this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i may as well chuck this out there bc i feel like the cat one was super short.
> 
> next chapter: yosuke's freaking out. serious freaking out though.


	5. edge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adachi and him, Yosuke thinks, aren't so different after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sends out slaying sos

He thinks he’s gonna go crazy.

He barely manages to make it to the Samegawa floodplain right after school. Maybe he stumbled once or twice, but there’s no one around to see him in such a mood. In fact, he’s lucky no one’s around—at least he can sit here on this bench and sulk like there’s no tomorrow. And actually go crazy in the process.

It’s barely been a month since the case has been closed, since the mystery has been solved—since Adachi was put behind bars. It’s a good thing too, Yosuke knows, and now Saki has been avenged and no one else will get hurt anymore. Everything’s back to normal, and there’s no more danger.

So now there’s just… nothing.

God, even as he thinks it, he knows that’s not true. He has his friends, Souji, his family. He has this town that he now loves and would give anything to protect. But—from what? What can he possibly protect his loved ones from? Maybe it’s great that there’s nothing—but there’s _too much_ nothing. It’s almost like before, back before Souji ever came and transferred into town. It’s just—it’s so damn _boring_ now.

It’s a thought that terrifies him, a thought that readily _plagues_ him. In his mind, he remembers words spoken from a murderer’s mouth, from _Adachi’s_ mouth, and he turns them over and over, trying to separate himself from them, trying to see _himself_ and not—not a _monster_ like Adachi.

_This hick town is so damn boring…_

_I knew right then that this was gonna be_ fun _._

Damn it. Isn’t that what his shadow had said? The part that he wanted to deny… he’d been _glad_ the murders had started. He’d been glad that there was something to do about it _too_ and he used Saki… he used Saki as an excuse to get in on the action, to become something like a _hero_.

It’s still hard to even think about, but he knows those feelings to be true. He knows that they’re feelings he harbours.

And that’s why… if he’d gotten that unique power like Adachi’s and Souji’s… he might have… he might’ve—

Yosuke feels his chest tighten, and it’s suddenly hard to breathe. Incredibly _terrified_ all of a sudden, he fumbles for his phone, shoving his hand into his pocket until he can feel the case, warmed from his leg. Flipping it open, he presses the number two for speed-dial, calls, and almost punches himself in the head with his phone with the amount of desperation coursing through his veins.

Souji picks up within two rings.

“Yosuke?” The calm tone addresses him immediately and Yosuke clutches his phone tighter like it’s a lifeline he can’t afford to let go of.

“S-Souji—“ Yosuke swallows hard, not knowing what to _say_ exactly and he can’t even start babbling because he wouldn’t know where to _begin_ despite needing to get his fear out of the way without really thinking about it first. After all, Souji can reassure him, right? He’s smart, he’ll know within a second on what Yosuke’s freaking out about. He knows his partner—Souji should know _him_ enough so that he can tell him in that soothing voice that he’s being an idiot again.

“Yosuke?” Souji asks again when the silence stretches far too much; the concern within his voice is sharp. “What’s wrong?” He sounds as if he’s hurriedly packing something up, and there’re voices talking in the distance.

Inwardly, Yosuke curses himself, wondering whether he’s intruded on a busy moment for the other. He swallows now, and tries to force down his panic instead. Souji doesn’t need to hear this. He doesn’t. “I, um, sorry, partner. Nevermind. You’re doing s-something, right?” He hates the way his voice breaks in the middle of his sentence, and contemplates just hanging up on Souji to spare him the trouble of listening to Yosuke’s dumb problems.

“It’s fine,” Souji says instantly, then there’s a loud brush on his side, as if he’s doing something to the earpiece. A muffled voice is heard, then Souji’s voice comes back, clearer than before. Yosuke opens his mouth to ask what he’s doing, but Souji’s barrelling on before he can get a word out, “Tell me what’s wrong, Yosuke.”

God, even as the panic bubbles just beneath his skin, Yosuke is wildly throwing his thoughts around in an effort to get them straight, to actually say what’s on his mind but the more he thinks about it, the more he feels like he’s called up Souji because of a childish whim. Souji really doesn’t need to hear this? These are just a few thoughts playing up, his own brain playing tricks on him and—

“Yosuke,” Souji says once more, quietly and calmly. He seems to already know what the prolonged moment of silence is caused by, judging by the gentle prodding that follows after, “come on. Tell me. You sound stressed.”

“I-its, uh, it’s not really… anything to be stressed by…” Yosuke starts weakly, his will caving in immediately. “Look, it’s just a daily Yosuke freak-out, yanno? It’s dumb, so don’t worry about it, okay? Sorry for calling you—“

“It’s not dumb if you were panicked enough to call me,” Souji interrupts. A pause, in which Yosuke once again hesitates to actually say anything—because damn it, Yosuke shouldn’t be freaking out in the first place; what he’s thinking is really stupid and he _knows_ that he won’t fall as far as Adachi has but he can’t help _thinking_ that he might actually tip over that edge—and Souji speaks again, “Yosuke, I can hear you breathing.”

The random observation throws Yosuke off so much that he forgets what to say for a second. Then, “What?”

“Your breathing,” Souji remarks as if it’s perfectly normal, “it’s faster than normal.”

Yosuke feels a little affronted, for some weird reason. Why’s Souji listening to his _breathing_? “Wh-what about it?” he asks, a little defensively.

“It…” A sigh, “You really are panicking about this, aren’t you?” He’s not condescending in his tone at all, but the worry seems to have increased. When Yosuke doesn’t answer right away again, Souji continues, “Talk to me, Yosuke.”

But it’s _now_ the stubbornness lights up in Yosuke, and despite the other trying to get them back on track, he’s still confused by the breathing comment. “Wait, wait—you listen to my _breathing_?” He’s still trying to process that. It seems weird. Then again, _Souji_ is weird.

“Uh…” and _now_ Souji seems to get his own weirdness. Seems to. “It’s… just… something I notice,” he finally says, a little uncomfortably.

Whoops. “Oh, well, that’s cool, I guess,” Yosuke says immediately. He isn’t trying to make the other self-conscious—honestly, here Souji is trying to _comfort_ him and Yosuke’s just poking holes in Souji’s own actions. “Sorry,” he says again, and the guilt shows clearly this time.

“It doesn’t matter.” There’s a soft smile on Souji’s face; Yosuke can sorta tell, since he’s listened to it often enough while looking at the guy. Huh, he wonders if that’s kinda the same thing with Souji and Yosuke’s breathing—he can just tell after a certain amount of time. He tunes back in when Souji speaks again, “You should stop changing the subject, though.”

“I know, I know, I just…” Yosuke breathes in, breathes out. He’s more conscious of his breathing now since Souji’s remark, and at the reminder of _why_ he’s calling he feels that previous panic rise in him once more. He forces himself to stay calm.

“Yosuke?” Souji asks, a little softer now, and it sounds like he’s moving, indicated by faint footsteps; the background noises fade, and Yosuke figures he’s just moving around.

He swallows and continues, “It’s just, I’ve been thinking about what Adachi said. About… about his motives and all.” Even saying the name aloud brings up an old fire in him; even now, he’s still so damn _angry_ at what the murderer’s done because Saki hadn’t deserved her fate. He grips the phone tighter.

Souji lets out a breath, slow and long. He’s stopped moving, Yosuke suspects, because the shuffling movements on his end have paused. However, it starts back up within another second, and the other responds with a simple noise, “Ah.”

“Yeah.” Yosuke clenches his free hand in an effort to keep it from fidgeting. He feels jumpy, but he focuses his gaze ahead to the view of town. “You… you remember what my Shadow said, right? How I-I didn’t really care about Saki, how I used her as an excuse to get in on the excitement.” His hands start to shake. He hates this.

“Yosuke…” Souji seems to know what this’ll be about and is ready to counter him, but Yosuke shakes his head despite the other not being able to see it.

“Wait, partner, let me finish.” He says hurriedly, and tries to bat away his fears of rejection, of being despised. Souji’s already seen that side of him. Surely now… Souji won’t abandon him over something so-so— … ugh. He can’t even begin to describe it. He’s feeling both more anxious and stupid as the seconds tick on. “He said that I was bored here, that I thought it sounded like fun to go into the TV. Like an adventure, right?” Yosuke gives a nervous laugh, and it sounds painful to his own ears. “Well, it’s true. It’s… so damn true.”

“You’ve already accepted that part of yourself, Yosuke,” Souji tells him in a soothing voice.

“I-I know, partner,”—a hand rises to run through his own hair and his right knee starts to bounce; it makes him sick to his stomach to admit this aloud—“and I get that that should be the end of it. But the thing is, I was _really_ bored, partner. And it’s not—it wasn’t a normal boredom.” Yosuke wants to hit himself: he knows how dumb he’s sounding right now. He wants to apologize and hang up right now to spare the other from his whining.

But Souji isn’t irritated. “Go on,” he urges gently, and Yosuke absentmindedly notes the way those distant footsteps sound, like Souji may be walking on gravel, or something.

“When I told you that I thought you’d be like me—coming from the city, being bored as hell here… I really thought you’d understand.” Even as the words leave his mouth, he realises how nasty that sounds, and hastily tries to amend himself, “I-I don’t mean that in a bad way! I mean, it’s probably a good thing you didn’t, because you didn’t seem to mind this town and you didn’t seem bored.” He swallows when he hears a sharp intake of breath from over the phone. “It’s just-it’s just I was going _insane_ , partner. I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t stand the boredom. I needed something to entertain me. Country life isn’t the same as the city life, you know that, right?”—and it’s here his tone turns slightly desperate; he needs Souji to understand, otherwise-otherwise Souji’s _really_ gonna think he’s flipped—“So I think… deep down, a part of me really did want those murders to keep going. Even though I was wishing with all my might that they never happened, I was glad they did at the same time. It was… it was _fun_.” He chokes up here, the word tasting vile and _horrible_ in his mouth and he feels like he can’t breathe.

There’s nothing on Souji’s end in response. Yosuke thinks those footsteps have stopped, and he begins to fret even more. Breathing a little faster, he tries to fill in the sudden silence, fearing what may come out of Souji’s mouth and wanting to prolong the inevitable disgust towards Yosuke.

He hunches over,squeezing his eyes shut. “I-I _hated_ this town and I wanted to be entertained. Those murders were… they were so _exciting_. Even when I grieved at Saki’s death, I was so damn happy she died so that I could-could have some entertainment.” He wants to puke. He hates admitting this. He doesn’t want this all to be true, but he knows it is. Distantly, he hears footsteps over the phone again, and decides to just say what he truly fears.

“I’m… I’m just like _Adachi_ , aren’t I?”

“You’re not.”

And suddenly, Souji’s voice echoes both in Yosuke’s ear and right behind him. Jumping up, Yosuke almost trips as he whirls around—still pressing his phone against his head—to see Souji standing on the other side of the bench table. Blinking in shock, Yosuke’s mouth gapes for a moment, wondering whether Souji somehow magically teleported here, or had actually been here all along. Then he realizes that the footsteps he heard before weren’t over the phone—it’d been close by instead.

Souji flips his phone shut, ending the call. For a moment, Yosuke can only stare at the other as he approaches, and it’s only because of the beeping in his ear that he realises that Souji really is randomly in front of him. Slowly, Yosuke shuts his phone too before collapsing on the bench once more.

Hanging his head, he doesn’t want to look the other in the eye. He can’t.

“I am,” he finally says, a quiet protest to Souji’s words.

A sigh is heard—though Yosuke isn't sure if it's out of exasperation or patient weariness—and then movement. Not a moment later, he feels weight settle beside him, warmth pressed up close to his side and Yosuke draws in a breath when Souji puts an arm around his shoulders. For a moment, Yosuke considers drawing away, but... this is somehow really nice. It's like when Souji hugged him when he was crying— that felt awesome then, too. Souji's a comforting presence to be around, especially if there’s physical touch involved.

"You're really not," Souji says again, and it’s here he starts drumming his fingers absentmindedly on Yosuke’s shoulder. A cute mannerism, he thinks, kinda like his quirk of tapping his foot and nodding his head to the beat of his music, whether in battle or just chilling. However, he tries to forget that thought as soon as possible. Souji and the word ‘cute’ shouldn’t be mixed together in his mind. Ever.

“You sound so sure,” he responds sullenly, dragging his attention back to the depressing thoughts he’d been trying to avoid with his dumb observations; he casts his mind over and over again on the possibilities, the similarities between himself and Adachi, and he really feels like he’s gonna puke.

Souji hesitates, as if he doesn’t know what to say, and Yosuke’s kinda glad for it. While there’s a part of him that wants to be assured, the other part wants to be told he’s right. And that’s probably bad—actually, that’s downright _pathetic_ because here Yosuke is, trying to put himself down more and more and he _knows_ he’s throwing a pity party but _god_ , he really can’t help feeling this way. He’s probably being selfish again for the attention. Yeah, that’s right, since he’s pulled Souji away from something really important, for all he knows, just to be by Yosuke’s side.

“Yosuke, I think you’re wrong.”

Well, that’s blunt.

Yosuke frowns, begins to look at Souji but stops himself upon realising how close they are, how close Souji’s face is to his own now that he’s sitting beside him with a stare boring into the side of Yosuke’s head. It’d be uncomfortable, and Yosuke instead tries to nurse a protest that’s rising in the back of his throat, but Souji doesn’t seem to want to give him the opportunity to speak.

“I’ve been doing some research, specifically into Jungian Psychology.”

… _That’s_ unexpected.

“What’s that got to do with—“ Yosuke stops himself before he can blurt out _me_. When he thinks about it a bit more, that makes him sound self-centred. If he isn’t already, that is. He sighs instead, and keeps himself quiet.

Souji seems to take that as an invitation, “It goes into detail on the different aspects of the mind, specifically areas of which we can relate to with our experiences in the TV world. It definitely matches up with what Ameno-sagiri has told us about the origins of the shadows and the TV world itself.”

Wait, what? Who’s Ameno… oh yeah. Yosuke wants to hit himself. It hasn’t even been that long since the major showdown with Adachi, and he’s already forgetting all the important stuff. Good going, Yosuke.

“So you’re telling me that everything about the TV world is something we could’ve just researched?” There’s disbelief in his voice because that’s… that’s _whacky_. Is it really that simple? They could’ve just… then again, didn’t they? He’s pretty sure Naoto’s scoured every possible resource. Unless she hadn’t factored in psychological research? But even that’s a pretty weird concept to consider, because knowing Naoto, she definitely would’ve looked absolutely everywhere. Or had they done the research before Naoto ever popped up? Maybe that’s why Souji knows now. But—

“Well, I had to dig deep,” Souji says quietly, and it seems like there’s something else he isn’t saying. Yosuke files that thought away for later. “Anyway, the Jungian theory goes into what a ‘shadow’ of someone is exactly. We already know it’s just a part of ourselves that we want to deny, but there’s something else too that we haven’t considered.”

Yosuke’s burning with curiosity, but it’s like Souji wants an ‘OK’ to keep going. “Yeah?” He says, or at least he thinks he says it. He makes _some_ kind of noise, but it prompts the other to continue all the same.

Souji’s arm tightens around him slightly, so slightly that Yosuke almost doesn’t notice, but he does. “A shadow is the ‘you’ that you won’t pick. Whatever choices in life you make, the shadow is what you choose not to be, or what you don’t prefer. That’s why I think… that’s why I think you’re stronger than Adachi ever was, Yosuke. You chose not to be your shadow while Adachi fully embraced it. He gave into his deepest desires and chose his own destiny. You saw yourself and while you accepted it, you chose to live with it and be a better person.”

_Is that… true?_

Yosuke doesn’t know whether to believe it or not, but he can see the logic. He can see Souji’s argument, his own beliefs, and it… honestly touches Yosuke. To think someone can say all of that so _proudly_ with Yosuke on the mind—it’s an awesome feeling. And what Souji says makes sense, too. To the think that the shadow is not just a part that Yosuke denied existed, but also a part he consciously didn’t choose to be? He feels as if a big weight has been lifted off his chest at the realization of it.

He feels himself choking up slightly, and wills the burning in his eyes away. Damn it. He _refuses_ to get teary over this.

“Jeez, partner,” Yosuke whispers, ducking his head, “you know just what to say all the time, huh?” He feels his cheeks burning all of a sudden, and hopes that Souji doesn’t notice. He’s just so… _happy_ that Souji thinks that way, and that Souji can say it all with such confidence, as if there’s no doubt in his mind that Yosuke isn’t remotely like Adachi, and in fact _better_ than him. Well, Yosuke already knew that part for _sure_ —because hell, _anyone_ can do better than being a pathetic murderer—but hearing it from Souji makes it a thousand times more relieving.

 _This doesn’t mean you won’t become like Adachi one day, though_ , whispers that nasty little voice in the back of his brain. Yosuke stiffens, and tries to ignore it by focusing on the small chuckle that Souji’s let out. He kinda likes it when Souji laughs. Or—damn it. No. No he did _not_ just think that. It’s just—Souji’s a good best friend. A _really_ good one that Yosuke admires. That’s all.

He inhales, exhales. “Thanks, partner,” he finally whispers, and without realising it he’s leaning into Souji’s touch, not even feeling the sudden rigidness that greets his movements that slowly melts into something else.

“You’re welcome,” Souji replies quietly. Then, perceptive as ever, he adds, “I hear a ‘but’ in there, though.”

Of course, Souji’s right. Damn it, Yosuke doesn’t want to think about it anymore, but maybe it’s good that Souji’s prodding so much. Best to get it all out of his system, right? But… god, he doesn’t even want to mention this lingering thought; there’s still a fragment of doubt left, still something that screams about his own weakness. He can’t trust himself. He trusts—well, he trusts _Souji_.

“Um, yeah, there is,” Yosuke mutters, and suddenly realises how close he is to the other. Eyes widening, he swallows hard before trying to imperceptibly extract himself from the other’s warmth—not so much get away from it completely, but more so make it not seem like he’s enjoying being wrapped in Souji’s arm too much. N-not that that’s a _bad_ thing, really, but—damn it. Yosuke feels Souji withdraw, and his mind flashes back to what he’d been about to say. Damn it damn it. Now it seems like Yosuke doesn’t want to be near Souji but—it’s not like that yet… ugh, screw it.

Yosuke casts those thoughts out the window—or tries to, at least—before carrying on (and being acutely aware that he’s not as warm as before, now that Souji’s arm isn’t around him), “I know what you mean. I really do get it. I just—if—“ He can’t even get it out. He swallows, tries again, “If I ever, y’know, tip over that edge and become some kinda serial murderer just for kicks, you’ll stop me, won’t you?”

Honestly, there’s no doubt that Souji will be able to at all, but Yosuke wants that assurance—he _needs_ that assurance. Maybe he won’t fall off that psychological edge anytime soon, but he’s still young and Adachi is… sorta old. Well, sorta _young_ but older than Yosuke. In other words, there’s time for Yosuke to crack, even the slightest bit.

But Souji doesn’t sound all that worried when he answers, “You’re too nice to kill people for fun, Yosuke.”

He snorts. “That’s a tame way of putting it.” _Too nice, huh?_

“Still,” Souji nudges him, and out of the corner of his eye, Yosuke sees a warm smile directed at him. “I know you wouldn’t fall that far, Yosuke. You’re not a sociopath, for one.”

Yosuke manages to actually look at him full-on this time (and is sorta relieved to see that Souji isn’t so close now that they’ve separated). “I could be,” he answers, huffing slightly. However, he feels a bit better knowing that Souji isn’t afraid of that happening at all. Or, well, it can be that the other isn’t taking him seriously, but Yosuke doubts that.

“I have faith in you, like I’ve said.” Souji’s voice is soft when he speaks again; he leans back on the bench against the table, head tilted up towards the soft sky. Yosuke watches those movements, gaze trailing from Souji’s neck to his chin to his lips—then back forward hurriedly to the scenery when Souji continues. “If you’re this afraid of becoming like Adachi, then I don’t think you will. And again, you’re stronger than Adachi. You won’t give in, I know it.”

Wow. Yosuke ducks his head, trying to hide his small fluster. He doesn’t think he’ll get tired of hearing such praise from his friend, especially Souji. He takes a deep breath: he’s not as anxious as he was before about all this, what with Souji being a great help as always. Yosuke honestly doesn’t know how the other does it, how he’s so perfect and unfailingly kind and accepting. Well, Souji’s definitely not without flaws but… even _with_ flaws, Souji is…

Yosuke tries to carry on now, having enough of his own attitude. He’s confident now in himself, and in Souji too, to beat him down when he needs it. He can do this.

“Thanks, partner.” Yosuke stands suddenly, and he turns to face Souji, grinning when he spots a perplexed look aimed at him. “I really needed that, I think. Aaaand to treat you for putting up with me,”—Souji opens his mouth, as if to protest, but Yosuke barrels on over him—“we’re gonna go eat at Aiya’s! My shout!” He gives a thumbs-up. “How ‘bout that?”

After a quick moment of contemplation, Souji sighs and finally nods. He stands, that same soft smile curving those lips once more. “Sounds good.”

They end up talking about mundane things as they walk, and Yosuke thinks it’s a good thing. It’s probably better, in the end, to pretend there’s no ‘edge’ for him to fall off from to begin with.

As long as he has Souji beside him, everything will be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im die lkjasklfj
> 
> sO I. FINALLY FINISHED THE GAME (oops i hadn't finished the game before writing in this fandom wheezes don't killme). and i didn't reaLISE THAT SOCIAl links weren't actually specifically set to rank up at certain times and that instead you had to slowly work at them omg i fail lkasjf i meAN In some cases you can't rank them up until after a certain part in the game bUT I DIDN'T KNOw you still had to do the spending time thing which is why i only got up to rank 2 with marie omfg. oifjqiwojfmkf buT YEAH THERE'S MY FAILURE with that game hopefully i do better on my second playthrough aslkfj
> 
> sORRY I HAD TO SHARE THAT BUT-- yeah lkjasf the reason for this chapter is because... wELL THEY REALLY ARE sorta similar??? yosuke and adachi-- which gets me thinking that if yosuke were to ever, y'know, lkjasf winks a lOT then he'd have um. yeah. these thoughts are mainly influenced by the magician manga lkjasf .... aND ALSO i got my info from mr edogawa's tv station in the game as well as wikipedia since the jung theory is a thing lkjasf ... it makes me wonder why they never mentioned it in-game (bc i vaguely remember them actually researching about shadows and stuff?? i can't remember fully what they talk about but i know they didn't go into jung pysch), or if they did mention it in-game then i fail and this should automatically be considered au omg lkjasf
> 
> ok yeah that's it. finishing it here before these notes get too long slakfj
> 
> next chapter: fun times with the drag costumes.


	6. fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yosuke's pretty damn sure the IT needs a personal therapist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i lied there's no fun with drag but i got carried away with this idea ok lkajsf enjoy!!!

Of course Yosuke has to trip up during a crucial battle.

Souji has told him, over and over again, that Yosuke is the front line of offense along with Chie—and sometimes Kanji or Naoto when they decide to travel together—and the one time that Yosuke doesn’t do it, it’s when something seriously bad happens. Yukiko had been injured badly because he’d been dumb enough to think he could provide some defence when in fact it’s _Souji_ who has to fall back on that while Yosuke and Chie covered him.

So since this effectively ruined the team pattern— _and_ effectively ruined this training run in the TV world—they had to throw up a Goho-M and return back to their world to get some well-needed rest.

Sure, Yosuke’s mucked up several times (and Souji hadn’t snubbed him off _then_ ), but the others have as well. He’s pretty sure Chie’s broken out of pattern more than once to save Yukiko when Naoto had already been on the job, so why is _Yosuke_ the only one getting the silent treatment from their leader? Because it sucks. It really _does_ because getting ignored by Souji is something he readily abhors— _he hates me he’s gotten tired of me he finally saw me for the loser I am_ —yet honestly? Souji doesn’t do that. Souji talks to him when Yosuke wants to be stubborn as hell on the few times that they _do_ fight and that persistent communication had been the only thing keeping their friendship from spiralling down the drain and cutting Yosuke off the team (though of course, it’d be self-inflicted; Souji’s too much of a saint to ever do that and Yosuke has the feeling the others would just drag him back anyways).

So, yeah, it doesn’t make sense that Souji’s giving him the cold shoulder after a minor muck up. Except he _is_. And Yosuke’s kinda sulking. Only a little bit, though.

There’s a lot of evidence that points toward it too, id est (in an effort to be _professionally_ cross about this):

  *          Whenever Yosuke calls or texts him, Souji only replies with one-word answers.
  *          Whenever it’s a call or text for a request to hang out, Souji says no.
  *          Souji hasn’t uttered a word to him during school and doesn’t want to share that delicious tonkatsu lunch with him.
  *          Yosuke is _pretty_ sure that Souji is hanging out with Kanji more than him now.



Okay, granted, this has taken place over the course of two days but Yosuke isn’t overreacting. He _isn’t_ , damn it. Just because he’s bored and work hasn’t been calling him in for every hour of his free time _does not mean_ he’s over-analysing. He has other things to do as well! He’s not _that_ pathetic (he hopes).

“Ooooh, so you and Sensei are having some sort of spat?” Teddie asks; he’s abnormally bright for a Sunday morning even when Yosuke just buries his head in his pillow after explaining the entire situation and is the perfect picture of _miserable_.

“Pretty much,” Yosuke mumbles into the cotton. He thinks he feels a piece of his own hair in his mouth, tangling in between a couple of the lower teeth, but he can’t be bothered tugging it out.

“On a few shows I’ve watched, the main characters just talk about their feelings!” Teddie’s beaming at him. Yosuke can tell from the way his voice sounds. He wants a shove a tissue into Teddie’s mouth. “Ooor, if you really think it’s bad, you just go and buy a gift for your partner; that’s a sure-fire way of making them shine forgiveness on your sorry soul!”

Yosuke jerks his head up and, knowing he has bad bed hair, gives a heated glare at the blond, a sharp retaliation accompanying it, “I’m not a sorry soul, you dumb bear!” He’s satisfied when that garners a soft squeak, and gets pissed when a pillow is promptly biffed at his face.

In the ensuing pillow fight—though maybe it’s a bit more violent on Yosuke’s end—he can’t help but consider Teddie’s words. Maybe a gift will help soften the silence between him and Souji. He doesn’t think he’s actually gotten him anything before though, so maybe it’ll be worth a try.

But… what the hell is he gonna get him?

* * *

A few hours after victoriously tossing Teddie into the closet with his hair full of feathers, Yosuke finds himself in the middle of Junes.

It’s a little pathetic, Yosuke has to admit, that he’s found here when he actually has the free time to _not_ be here. There’s a mission to be had, though, and Yosuke uses that thought to steel himself against the bewildered glances of his co-workers.

Right. Time to find himself a present.

Two hours later though, he’s collapsed on a chair in the food court, miserable at the fact that he literally has no idea what to get Souji at all. Which is sad, because they're partners so Yosuke should know what Souji wants. And yeah, Yosuke is aware of Souji's hobbies but what's Yosuke supposed to get him that Souji can't get for himself? And what would even be considered good gift quality?

"Wow, you look pretty miserable."

Yosuke lifts his head from his arms and cracks open an eyelid. "Shut up, Chie."

Of course she had to discover him here, along with Yukiko who's looking amazing as always. He's halfway to telling them to go away or flat out ignoring them when an idea occurs. Sitting up straighter with a speed that makes Chie jump in surprise, Yosuke levels a desperate gaze to her and Yukiko.

"Wait, you gotta help me!" He demands, and even leaps out of his seat.

"Depends..." Chie starts, then something seems to occur to her that makes her eyes widen in realization. "Ooooh, I get why you're sulking now!" Confusion stumps Yosuke from insulting her outright, so she manages continue, "you and Souji are in a fight, right?"

At the reminder, Yosuke slumps back in his seat. He doesn’t know how she knows—maybe Teddie’s texted her or something, he can’t care less. "Don't remind me," He moans miserably instead.

"You two are in a fight?" Yukiko's concerned, at least. "Oh, we'll have to fix that, won't we, Chie?"

"We'll help," Chie declares, and that gets Yosuke’s hopes up until she continues, “but you're apologizing to him on your own!"

"Whaaat?" Yosuke sorta expected this, but he's put off by the eagerness in her tone. "But I wouldn't know what to say!"

"Yeah, Chie!" Yukiko gives Chie a reproachful look, which only makes Yosuke love her more. "We have to help him! This'll create a rift in the group, won't it?"

"Oh, Yukiko..." Then Chie leans over and whispers something in Yukiko's ear that makes the taller girl's eyes widen in comprehension, and so dashes any possibility of Yosuke getting any verbal support.

"R-really?" He had no idea what Chie's told her but Yosuke figures it's something girly and philosophical, how Yosuke should earn forgiveness by himself blah blah. Yukiko turns to him with wide eyes, and there's an understanding and sympathetic look that makes Yosuke want to groan again. "Wow, so you and Souji-kun...?"

He has no idea why she's so surprised but he's getting impatient. "Yeah, partners fight sometimes, okay?" He snaps out. "Can we skip to the part where you guys help me now?"

Chie looks miffed. "Not with that attitude!" She responds with just as much viciousness. She huffs and links her arm with Yukiko's. "C'mon, Yukiko!"

"W-Wait!" Crap, there goes his chances of landing a decent present (and maybe date,  because woah, hanging out with both Chie and Yukiko—even if he might not date Chie if she were the last girl on earth—on their day off? Best thing that can happen to him girlfriend-wise, if he’s honest) and making it up to Souji. "Come on! Help a guy out!"

"Snrrk—" Yukiko seems to take pleasure in his pain, her face screwing up in pure mirth. "Ahaha, d-don’t worry about it, Yosuke! Everything will work out fine since you two are boy—“

“Shhhh!!” Chie immediately covers her mouth and starts to drag Yukiko away (if it can even be _called_ dragging; Yukiko doesn’t seem too concerned following Chie anywhere). “Yosuke’s gotta figure this out allll on his own! Let’s go, Yukiko!”

“H-hey!” Yosuke half-stands, gaping after them and wonders whether to even _try_ recovering the situation. Before he can make a decision, however, Chie and Yukiko have already disappeared, leaving Yosuke in the dust.

Groaning aloud, Yosuke slumps back down in his seat. What the hell’s up with Chie? Can’t she see he’s desperate?! And what was Yukiko about to say? Something about him and Souji being boys? How’s _that_ gonna help things?

Ugh. He supposes it doesn’t matter. He needs to make-do with what he has now. Maybe he should try having a look in Okina.

* * *

 He arrives in Okina city, and decides immediately that fate hates him.

As soon as he pulls up with his scooter, he thinks he sees two familiar figures disappear into 30 Frames Cinema and admittedly almost tips his vehicle over in shock. Hurriedly straightening it and flipping out the stand, he has to stand there for a few moments just to gather his thoughts and quell the sudden spike of _something_ in his chest that’s constricting his breathing so painfully.

Was that… Souji and _Kanji_ heading into the theatre _together_?

Yosuke still has to process that fact. It’s not like _he_ hasn’t gone in with Souji before but-but… well, that’s _weird_ , isn’t it? He had no idea that Souji swung that way, and with _Kanji_ … boy, he feels like a huge dumbass now. How long has he been giving passing remarks towards Kanji about his gayness? To find out that Souji might be affected himself… okay, yeah. Yosuke Hanamura is a huge asshole. He gets that now.

Just—why does Souji have to be with _Kanji_ of all people? It’s not that Kanji isn’t a bad person but… just _why_?

He doesn’t know how long he stands there, gaping like an idiot at 30 Frames when the two in question have already gone in, but there’s a swivel of cobalt on the edge of his vision that jolts him back to reality. Recognizing the newcomer immediately, Yosuke almost trips over his scooter to greet them.

“N-Naoto!” He exclaims.

She seems neutral as always, but there’s something else about her right now that Yosuke can’t pinpoint right away. Like she’s… uncomfortable with a recent revelation, or something equally as disturbing with her.

Wait, maybe she saw…?

“Oh, Yosuke-senpai,” She greets with a small smile. “What are you doing here?”

Naoto’s always been the one that Yosuke can go complaining to most about the weirdness of their entire group—after all, everyone else is insane. Honestly: Kanji’s a tough guy who knits, Teddie’s a moron out of a magical TV world, Souji’s a huge nerd who loves cats too much and somehow can do everything, Yukiko has her laughing fits, Chie’s just… Chie, and Rise—well, there’s nothing wrong with _Risette_ but damn, she acts funny in ways that Yosuke can’t really explain. So, compared to all of them, Naoto’s as normal as Yosuke.

And with all _that_ in mind, Yosuke jumps straight to the problem at hand. “Did you see Souji and Kanji walk into the theatre together?”

Naoto stiffens like she’s eaten something nasty—and there’s an unusual flush rising up her cheeks too. Her eyes avert, and there’s a mumble escaping her that Yosuke doesn’t catch until he asks her to repeat herself. “I-I did, actually.”

“So?” Yosuke asks, a little impatiently. He doesn’t mean to be rude, but damn it, this is important! “What do you think?”

Naoto still seems dazed at the very prospect they’re discussing right now. However, upon Yosuke’s words, she isn’t offended—no, it’s like she’s suddenly realised something about _Yosuke_ , weirdly enough, judging by how she’s looking at him now. “Oh. I see,” Is all she says in response, as if she hasn’t heard him at all.

“What?”

“I-I mean, I did not know that you and Souji…” Her eyes avert once again to the theatre, features distant and contemplative.

Yosuke frowns. He’s not too sure what she’s on about, but he can guess. “Yeah, we’re having a fight, okay?” He tries to push forward, annoyed by the vague observations he’s getting. “Can’t you like, analyse the situation or something? Souji and Kanji aren’t _partners_ now, are they?” The thought itself makes Yosuke taste bile on his tongue. That’s _his_ position, damn it! Right beside Souji, as his best friend, his partner—his _equal_. Surely Souji won’t try to replace him after a little mistake Yosuke made?

His words make Naoto frown as well and Yosuke prays inwardly that she’ll be able to help him now. “I would not think so,” she finally says; her arms cross, gaze fixated on 30 Frames once more. “I imagine they have decided to just… hang out. It is a normal thing between friends, is it not?” She gives a pointed stare at Yosuke now.

“Wh—?“ Yosuke holds up his hands defensively. “Don’t look at me like that! If you’re suggesting that I’m jealous—!”

“I am not. I am merely suggesting that that may be the case—”

“But I’m really not jealous! Hell, _Rise_ would make me more jealous than Kanji! I wouldn’t be able to stand a chance with her!” Wait. Wait. _Backtrack_. Naoto’s looking at him like she’s struck gold, and he flusters immediately, waving his arms firmly. “NO. No, that’s _not_ what I meant! Damn it—th-then _you’re_ jealous, too!” Yeah, that’s it! Gotta derail it back to her!

Surprisingly, it actually works. Naoto starts to blush, and the colour spreading through her cheeks kinda makes her really cute. Shaking off that thought, Yosuke focuses on his triumph.

“So you _are_!” He crows, grinning widely. “I _knew_ there’d be a thing between you and Kanji!”

“Wh-what?!” Naoto sputters, eyes wide. “I do not have a ‘thing’ with him!”

“Haha, really?”

“H-he merely asked me to spend time with him tomorrow!” Naoto is a crimson beacon by now, her fists shaking by her sides. “I said yes because I was curious as to why h-he has acted so oddly around me!”

Yosuke rubs his hands together. “Soooo it’s a date?”

“Nothing like that!” Naoto denies fiercely.

“Yeah, well, you gotta help me find a present for Souji, then,” Yosuke says breezily instead, completely ignoring her answer. Atta boy, Kanji! But, wait… He freezes. “Wait, s-since Souji and Kanji are going in the theatre together—and since you and Kanji _might_ not be hanging as a couple together tomorrow—, does that mean those two might… _actually_ … be on a date?” Since him and Souji aren’t really _a thing_ as Naoto might think, and Kanji and Naoto are _about-to-be-a-thing-but-this-may-cockblock-that-thing_ , that must be the reason why Souji and Kanji are together now. Yosuke has no idea why he feels so bummed about it, but he does.

Naoto seems to be depressed at the revelation; she’s probably thinking the same thing. “Th-that’s right,” She mutters. “It would… confirm that the outing I have with Kanji… is only between friends… wh-which is perfectly fine, I-I think…”

Yosuke groans, and would’ve commented on her total lack of self-awareness on her feelings towards Kanji, but he’s far too gone in his own turmoil, “And that would mean me and Souji aren’t… _partners_ anymore…”

No, this is _way_ too much…

…

“Hey, guys—uh…?”

Rise finds them half an hour later slumped over a customer table at Café Chagall, radiating a decidedly sulky and depressed aura. Naoto’s forehead is pressed to the table but her eyes are narrowed at the furniture as if it’s the most insulting and depreciating thing in existence whereas Yosuke just bundles his head in his arms and looks like he’s sleeping.

“Wow… what happened here?” She asks, trying to garner a peek at both Yosuke’s and Naoto’s expression, going as far as to lean over and poke at Naoto’s cheek.

Yosuke can’t even find the energy to lift his head to deliver a clear answer, deciding instead that a muffled one is enough for her. “Souji and Kanji are on a date,” is what he says. Or, _tries_ to say.

“What?” Rise frowns, moving over to Yosuke’s side of the table.

Yosuke finally deigns to lift his head, giving Rise a bleary look as he repeats, “Souji and Kanji are on a date.”

…

Rise immediately joins them.

She’s more vocal than Yosuke and Naoto, at least, and that’s saying something. Yosuke feels the reverberations through the table of her fists weakly punching it. “I-I didn’t know S-Senpai swung that waaaayyy…!” She moans out, and Yosuke’s almost horrified to hear sniffling sounds. He presses his face firmly into his arms, and hopes to god that she doesn’t start crying. He knows Rise can be dramatic sometimes, but at least now he can actually understand her pain.

Or, well… not understand it in _that_ way. B-because even if Souji _doesn’t_ swing that way, Yosuke won’t care: he just wants his partner to stay his partner, after all. Nothing more, nothing less.

“How could he do this to me?” Naoto’s breathy utterance finally reaches his ears, and Yosuke peeks. She still hasn’t stopped glaring at the table, and it’s obvious she’s speaking referring to Kanji. “I knew it… he must have been plotting to assassinate me this whole time… he would not be so eager to meet me tomorrow if he were already an item with Souji… there is no other explanation for his actions.”

Yosuke groans inwardly.

 _This whole team needs a goddamn therapist_.

* * *

 “Okay, that’s it!”

There’s an abrupt motion to the table as Rise jumps up; her eyes are full of determination and she doesn’t seem to hear the yelp of pain from Naoto caused from her movements, nor Yosuke’s annoyed grunt from having been dispositioned so suddenly. Instead, Rise slips over between them, shaking their shoulders with renewed vigour.

“I-I know it’s hard, guys, but we can’t give up!” Yosuke can still hear the tremor in her tone, and wonders how much she really does love Souji and even whether she’s truly okay with this. The thought gives him a bad stomach ache. “The road may seem uncertain and sorrowful right now, but we have to push on! This is the first time I’ve heard of them going on a date, so it must be their first one! With that in mind… I think we should try to guide them in a better direction!”

“You… may be right,” Naoto slowly lifts her head, eyeing Rise with wonder.

“Yeah…” Yosuke feels a little pumped now, Rise’s enthusiasm leaking into him. “This isn’t the end—even if it is a date, we can still work with the situation!”

“Exactly!” Rise grins widely at them both and plants her hands on her hips. “I’m… honestly sad that Senpai doesn’t have any interest in girls, so that’s why… that’s why I’ve decided to hook him up with you, Yosuke-senpai!”

Wait—

“ _What?!_ ” Yosuke gawks, “y-you’re kidding, right?! You meant ‘ _partners’_. Like, hook him back to be my _partner_ , right?” He cannot believe this he cannot believe this he canno—

“O-oh, right!” Rise seems to realize what he’s saying after the initial confusion and nods. “I’ll get Souji back as your partner and Naoto can have Kanji all to herself!”

Naoto stiffens at that. “Wh-why would I want him all to m-myself?” She stutters, going positively red in the face. “H-he is merely a f-friend to me! A-and I am sure that he must h-hate me because of how oddly he acts around me, s-so it is only logical to assume that—“

“Shhh,” Rise purrs, coiling an arm around Naoto’s shoulders which makes the other girl become more rigid. “I know _exactly_ what you mean! I have your back!”

Yosuke honestly doubts it since Rise seems to be dead-set on setting Naoto and Kanji up—then he wonders whether Rise agreed with him while nursing an ulterior motive. Horror rises up in him at the thought, but he swallows hard to negate the anxiety bubbling up inside him. Oh, _hell_ no. He’ll just have to make sure that Rise won't do that at _all_.

“Okay!” Rise crows, fist pumping the air. “Operation, um…” She looks helplessly at Yosuke, as if he might have some sort of clue as to what to call this idea.

“Uh, I don’t know.” Yosuke raises his hands up in an effort to block her pleading eyes. “Team Break-Up-Souji-And-Kanji?”

“We can’t use that!” Rise makes the change from helpless to completely aghast. “That-that sounds really bad when you put it that way!”

“Well, it’s what we’re doing, isn’t it?”

“No way! We’re just helping them see that there are _better_ options out there than each other!”

“So, essentially, we’re pre-emptive breaking them up?”

“What?! You’re horrible!”

“I am not! You’re the one who suggested this!”

“But I wouldn’t be so blunt about it! We have to do it in a certain way!”

“Guys,” Naoto’s butts in firmly, “We should try to think of a way to do this before their movie ends.”

Both Yosuke and Rise look at her in surprise, the former admittedly forgetting already that Naoto’d been here in the first place. Then he realises that he just argued with _Risette_ and he wants to beat himself up. Still, though, she should admit that they’re planning something that’s actually _bad_. Not that Yosuke’s against it, of course, but it’s pretty… _underhanded_.

“Right,” Rise huffs, and shoots Yosuke a glare before stepping away from their standoff. “Any ideas?”

“Yosuke-senpai said that he was going to buy Souji-senpai a present before, right?” Naoto begins with a small smile. “That should perhaps be the first step.”

“A present?” That garners an eyebrow raise from Rise, but she’s starting to smile devilishly. “Oooh, it’s because of your fight, isn’t it?”

Yosuke chokes. “Who told you that?!” He demands, crossing his arms with a scowl on his face now. It’s not like he’s advertised it—well, not before _today_ , anyway—and he’s only told Teddie (who’s gone and told Chie who’s told Yukiko) and Naoto so far, so how did Rise know about this? Did someone tell her?

But she seems to be surprised at the aggravation in his tone. Her hands link behind her as she rocks on the balls of her feet thoughtfully. “Well, no one,” she admits, “I just figured since you’ve decided to get a present for him. After all, that’s what _partners_ do, right?”

Yosuke feels like there’s something else in her tone that he isn’t getting, but he tries to brush off the unease in his stomach. “Yeah…” He says, somewhat suspiciously.

“Alright, let us get on with this then.” Naoto ends their conversation there, and Yosuke’s relieved. “Souji has a preference for cats, does he not?”

“Oh, I know!” Rise grins, brightening immediately. “We should get him a cat costume set! I bet Croco Fur has one!”

“Oh, hell no!” Yosuke immediately interrupts, scowling. “I am _not_ wearing a cat costume while fighting! The crossdressing outfits are bad enough!” And the bath towels. And the Halloween costume—well, okay, that wasn’t as horrible. At least Yosuke doesn’t have to fear the only piece of cloth preserving his dignity falling off. Ugh, Yosuke _swears_ Souji has some sorta fixation problem with the outfits. It’s probably one of the only things Yosuke and Kanji agrees on. And maybe Souji’s ‘chiselled abs’. Just maybe.

“I would have to agree with Yosuke-senpai on this one,” Naoto mutters, adjusting her cap. “My Halloween costume itches enough as it is.”

Oh yeah. Yosuke almost forgot about that. He thought it looked pretty cool on Naoto, though, considering he only sees her in navy colours.

“How about chocolates?” Rise asks, a little too brightly for her words to be real. Yosuke sends her an immediate glare in response.

“That’s for Valentine’s Day!”

“Oh, sorry,” Rise doesn’t look very sorry. “I didn’t know you already had plans!”

Yosuke groans aloud once more, face palming.

“Ah, how about a bag of the coffee beans they sell here?” Naoto perks up, looking to the interior of the café. “Senpai comes here often, I hear.”

 _He does?_ Yosuke peers at the owner who seems to be chatting amiably with a couple near the entrance. Maybe they should, then.

“Seconded!” Yosuke says hastily and with finality. In before Rise gets anymore weird ideas, right?

* * *

 “That’ll be thirty thousand yen, please!”

Yosuke chokes. Rise chokes as well. Naoto’s calm when she pays for it, and they all head outside again.

“Th-that’s so expensive!” Yosuke moans, covering his face with his hands. God, Souji must be _loaded_ to spend the amount of time he does at this café that Naoto suggests.

“I know, right?” Rise’s just as scandalized, and she turns to Naoto. “How can you even afford that?!”

“Simple budgeting,” Naoto responds as if that answers everything. It actually does. “The materials we sell to Daidara and the yen that we acquire from the numerous Shadows we’ve fought has helped immensely.” She frowns then, giving them both a confused look. “What do you two do with the money we split?”

Yosuke opens his mouth to answer, but Rise hurriedly intervenes, “M-moving on!” She plucks the bag of beans out of Naoto’s hands and inspects it. “We’ll have to wrap it up, won’t we?”

Oh, yeah. Yosuke honestly almost forgot why they’ve bought it in the first place. Then he registers what Rise’s said. “No,” He says flatly, immediately. “I’m not going to wrap it. I’ll just give it to him as it is.”

Rise frowns at him. “That’s hardly ro—“ Her eyes widen, and she covers her mouth with her free hand.

“Ro…?” Yosuke squints, then gapes when he realizes what she’d been about to say. “Romantic?! Why would I wanna— I _told_ you, I only want to stay partners with Souji, so can we _please_ not jump on the idea that I’ll date him?”

Rise opens her mouth to respond—probably something vicious, he figures—but something stops her. Her eyes widen, focusing on a point just above his shoulder, and Yosuke becomes impatient, wondering what’s got her so hung up until he realises that Naoto’s looking where Rise is as well, her eyes just as wide.

An idea occurring to him, Yosuke gulps before slowly turning around.

And there, of course, is Souji. Kanji’s right behind him, squinting suspiciously at the three of them in one place, but Yosuke’s attention zeroes in on the fact that he can’t read his partner at _all_. Normally, there’s something there for him to see what emotion is currently on Souji’s mind, or rather, what _thoughts_ are there because sometimes they’re on the same wavelength enough for Yosuke to speak up for the both of them. However this time… Souji’s just… _blank_.

“Oh,” Yosuke starts weakly, clears his throat nervously, “um, hey?”

“Yosuke,” Souji finally acknowledges after a painful split second of silence. There’s a tilt to his lips, like he’s trying to smile, and Yosuke tenses. Right. He almost forgot that Souji’s mad at him. That’s probably why he’s so annoyed to find him here (or, at least, Yosuke _thinks_ he’s annoyed). “What’re you three doing here?”

“Oh, well, you see…” Yosuke hears Rise cough behind him, and Naoto doesn’t seem as if she wants to speak at all. “W-were you, um…”

Damn. Damn it all. How did this get so awkward?

Yosuke groans yet again. Time to get the ball rolling, he figures, so he turns and grabs the bag of coffee beans from Rise’s hand and shoves them at Souji almost forcefully, unable to meet Souji’s eyes. Strange feelings flutter in his stomach, and he pegs the cause of it down to how Souji doesn’t seem to want to meet his eyes either.

“I… I just wanted to say I’m sorry,” Yosuke gets out hastily, almost tripping over his words. He dares to glance up at Souji and finds that he still isn’t looking at him, but instead at the ground like Yosuke was before. Yosuke swallows, and tries to carry on before he completely loses his nerve.

“I-I mean, you weren’t on a date with Kanji, were you?”

Shit.

As soon as he says it, he wants to throw himself in the nearby gutter and disappear through the cracks somehow.

 _Wow._ Wow _. Good going, Yosuke. You_ really _know how to stay on topic._

“Wh-what?! Why—?” Yosuke would’ve laughed at Kanji’s expression if he weren’t feeling so mortified. As it is, Kanji’s looking more and more offended by the second. “O-oi! Would you quit that already?! I’m interested in _girls_ , okay?! U-uh—“ Kanji casts a wide-eyed glance at Souji that Souji doesn’t return. “N-not that I _wouldn’t_ date you, senpai! I-I just—!” He turns red when he accidentally looks at Naoto (who looks away herself immediately) and starts coughing uproariously.

Souji is as impassive as ever. Yosuke wants him to crack at least the _smallest_ bit so that Yosuke can tell what he’s thinking, but at the same time he’s afraid of what Souji really _is_ thinking. He gets some indicator, though, when Souji turns to Kanji with the straightest face ever.

“Oh, we weren’t on a date?”

Yosuke suddenly starts choking on his own spit. Wheezing for breath, he squints at a perfectly emotionless Souji (with Kanji gawking like a dying fish out of water on the side-lines) and tries to phrase proper words.

“Wh-what the hell, dude?!” Yosuke half-yells out the words, disbelieving that Souji is actually _serious_ about this ‘cause heck—majority of the time, Souji really _isn’t_ and Yosuke always dies a little bit inside as a result. “You’re kidding, right?!”

Naoto makes something like a… whining _dog_ noise behind him. Kanji makes a noise too, and Yosuke would’ve been snapping at them to quit it and take it somewhere else, but he doesn’t feel like it. He’s grateful that they take whatever discussion they’re having to the side (full of awkward stammers from Naoto and aggressive requests to do things from Kanji), and a part of him wonders where Rise has gone. Probably to run interference with Kanji and Naoto, but Yosuke doesn’t check. He’s a little too preoccupied with Souji coming a little closer to him, though for whatever reason, Yosuke has no idea.

“You thought so too, didn’t you?” Souji tilts his head like he’s the most innocent person in the world, the little— “I appreciate the coffee beans, though I have no idea why you got me them.”

In the back of his mind, Yosuke notes that Souji’s more formal with him than usual, a trait that can be attributed to the poker face he has on right now but… it feels like something more. Yosuke isn’t dumb when reading his partner, after all. So, to know things are somehow… _tense_ between them—maybe even more-so than before—, his insides wilt.

“Well, y’know,” Yosuke mutters, waving his hand weakly at them as he casts his eyes down once more, “they’re a… a thing from me to you for mucking up during our training session the other day…”

It’s Souji’s turn to look surprised now. “You did?” He asks, the straight-face façade dropping when his eyes widen. “I… don’t remember that.”

What.

“What?” Yosuke flatly repeats aloud, unbelieving right now of the words Souji is saying to him. “You mean… you weren’t avoiding me ‘cause I didn’t follow your instructions during battle?!” What the hell what the hell what the _hell_ —

“No,” Souji says, pure and simple yet with such a confused tone. “I wasn’t avoiding you at all…” He frowns then in comprehension. “You don’t mean the time when we went into the TV a few days ago, do you…?”

God, when Souji puts it like _that_ Yosuke _really_ feels like he’s overreacted. Less than a week—no, less than _half_ a week—and Yosuke’s jumping to conclusions and—crap crap _crap crap crap_ —he suddenly wants to be anywhere but _here_ making a fool of himself (because damn it, that’s _Souji’s_ job ‘cause isn’t _he_ the Fool) in front of his partner.

“Maybe,” he mutters and hopes the other doesn’t hear it. He covers his face, feeling it burn up like the sun. “Just take the damn coffee, okay?” Even though Naoto paid for it. Man, he owes her for that.

There’s a rustle then, as if Souji’s clutching the coffee bag tightly, but Yosuke doesn’t want to look. His face still feels like it’s burning, and he can sorta hear Rise’s high voice cutting in front of Kanji’s wild embarrassment and Naoto’s proclamations of attempted murder (what the hell). Maybe he should jump in on that to save himself from this situation; Souji doesn’t seem to be doing anything, and the longer the seconds tick on, the more Yosuke wants to just hop on his scooter, flee from this scene, take up a new identity, move to a different country—

“Thank you, Yosuke.”

Huh?

A confused mumble spills from Yosuke as he finally takes down his hands, slowly and hesitantly. Eyes reluctantly seek Souji’s, but Souji isn’t even looking at him. He’s looking at the ground again, as if it really is the most interesting thing in the planet. The coffee beans are held in both hands and Yosuke notices how Souji clutches it tightly, then softens his grip a second later.

“I appreciate that you went out of your way to get this for me,” Souji elaborates and finally looks up. Their gazes connect, and though Yosuke can feels his cheeks flaring up again, he manages to hold the contact. Or, well, maybe not, because Souji’s eyes are too intense—too soft, too grateful, too _kind_ towards Yosuke—so he looks at other interesting things like Souji’s nose that doesn’t have any boogers or dust stuck in them because Souji is perfect, as always, and then his gaze drifts to Souji’s hair and he wants to tuck that stray lock that’s sticking up back into place; Souji’s cheeks are interesting too, faintly flushed because of recent events and the combination is odd with the pallor of Souji’s skin and the colour of his hair but no—wait, Yosuke realises it’s odd because he’s hardly _seen_ Souji blush and it’s kinda… it’s kinda… cu—

“O-oh, uh,” Yosuke clears his throat and rips his gaze away once more, this time to the side; a hand rises to the nap of his neck, rubbing it awkwardly. “It’s no problem, partner. I just, y’know, thought you were mad or something and so I thought I should probably get you that. It’s dumb, right? Ahahaha…”

“It’s not dumb,” Souji protests quietly, so quietly that Yosuke thinks he’s misheard. Before he can ask, however, he hears a faint buzzing sound, and instinctively his hand goes to his phone pocket before he realizes that it’d probably been Souji’s. Slipping it out and flicking it open, Souji stares at whatever message is displayed before he gives Yosuke an amused look.

“What?” Yosuke asks; he’s beginning to get a bad feeling about whatever text has been sent. The moment Souji moves closer and shows him it, he feels his insides drop rapidly. It’s from Yukiko.

_Souji-kun! I never knew that you and Yosuke-kun were boyfriends! Has he made up with you yet?_

Good god.

“If the gift was meant to be romantic, you could’ve wrapped it and given me chocolates too—“ Souji starts to say with that damn poker face again.

“See!” And then Rise is suddenly there, effectively ditching Kanji and Naoto in their own awkward bubble alone. “See! I told you! Senpai would’ve wanted chocolates!”

Flushing even _more_ now, Yosuke turns on her, waves his arms wildly. “I-I didn’t want it to be _romantic_ , damn it! How many times do I have to get that through your head?! I—“ Wait. Wait wait… does this mean that—what Teddie and Chie and Yukiko and Naoto thought before… did they think—?!

_On a few shows I’ve watched, the main characters just talk about their feelings!_

Chie whispering to Yukiko; Yukiko finally getting it.

_Wow, so you and Souji-kun...? … Everything will work out fine since you two are boy—_

Boy… BOYFRIENDS?!

_I-I mean, I did not know that you and Souji…_

No. _Hell_ no. The thought is—the thought’s _nice_ but—no, not _nice_ but—oh, god. Him and Souji? Like _that_? They’re just partners—well, not _that_ type of partner but—fuck. Damn it. Yosuke moans aloud and starts tugging at his hair.

“Why did this happen to me?” He slumps down in a nearby chair, starts to bang his forehead against the table surface. “I’m not Kanji, I swear!”

“OI!” And there’s Kanji yelling in his ear, as if he’d been listening this whole time. It’s like the guy has a ‘Someone-Thinks-I’m-Strange-I-Need-To-Wrangle-Them’ radar. “I AIN’T YOU! I’M NOTHING LIKE Y—mmphf!!”

Yosuke glances up when he hears a scuffle and sees Rise’s hand over Kanji’s mouth; Naoto and Souji look equally as ready to jump on the guy, and Yosuke swears aloud, jumping out of his seat to avoid Kanji toppling on him, as he dangerously looks like he’s about to.

“Wh-what the hell?!” Kanji sputters when he finally manages to get out of Rise’s grip.

“Oops, sorry!” Rise steps back, hands intertwined behind her back once more with a fairly embarrassed look on her face. “Force of habit!”

“Same,” Souji mutters. Even Naoto seems to relax marginally.

Okay. That’s it.

“Petition,” Yosuke grinds out through his teeth and everyone looks at him, “to hire a therapist for our whole damn group. Please.”

He’s half-joking, he’s half not; Naoto seems to be seriously considering the idea while Kanji and Rise frown in unison. Before they can say anything, however, Souji sidles up next to him, a lazy smile on his face as he rests a hand on Yosuke’s shoulder (a touch that sends out a small jolt through his body and Yosuke has to refrain from pulling away because Souji feels strangely _warm_ through Yosuke’s shirt).

“Don’t worry, partner,” Souji tells him quietly, and the title is nice to hear from his lips; Yosuke wants to hear it more often. Then that desire is swept from his mind when Souji continues, “We can be their therapists together.”

“That’s… not really what I meant.” Yosuke resists the urge to face palm again.

“We can drink this coffee together when we’re giving them therapy,” Souji lifts the coffee bag like a peace-offering. “My treat.”

“I don’t like coffee.” Yosuke hastily backtracks when Souji turns on that ‘hurt innocent’ look. “But, uh, it’s an acquired taste right?”

“Sooo, we’re gonna go now!” Rise announces, and starts hustling Naoto and Kanji out before they can protest. “Bye, Senpaaaiii!”

What the—? Yosuke blinks after them, then it occurs to him. Wait. Did Rise just—

“We can eat the beans while we’re watching a movie,” Souji says with a serious face, “like popcorn.”

“Wh-when did I say I was gonna watch a movie—?”

Yet despite his reluctance—or maybe lack of it—Souji’s dragging him towards the entrance of the cinema, buying them both a ticket to a movie Souji’s already seen. Yosuke’s about to loudly protest, but stops himself when it occurs to him that maybe this’ll be a good idea. After all… they haven’t really hung out in a while, right? Yeah. This’ll just be a thing between best friends…

And he’ll pretend that Souji doesn’t hold his hand throughout the whole thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welp i hope the IT's shenanigans were fun to read!! please leave a kudos and/or comment if you enjoyed!
> 
> p.s. thanks to [ivinicieiniti](http://archiveofourown.org/users/varentains) for helping proofread and also [jeuce](http://archiveofourown.org/users/reijeux) for checking characterization!
> 
> thanks for reading!!!! <3


	7. g-rated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yosuke learns to never accompany Souji on statue-finding ever again.

It’s supposed to be a routine TV run. Apparently Souji got some sorta tip that there’s a statue located within Yukiko’s castle from one of the students in their school—which is _weird_ because how would they know where the statue they want is? And why would they even want it in the first place? By the way that Souji’s describing it, it sounds incredibly ugly, and Yosuke would rather have been with the group that’s currently training up now in another part of the castle—consisting of Chie, Yukiko (who’d been sorely reluctant to come back here though of course she won’t protest, what a _cutie_ ), and Naoto; all the girls in one group, Yosuke _really_ would’ve killed to get in on that—instead of participating in this wild goose chase for a statue.

Heck, Kanji and Teddie seem happy enough about it, but Yosuke can’t help but bemoan this entire situation to his current group. It _sucks_ , honestly, and he has no problem expressing that. And it _definitely_ doesn’t help that Souji’s decided they should all dress in drag for this trip. Actually, that’s more than half the problem Yosuke has with all this.

“If we’re gonna search for some stupid artefact, couldn’t we at least do it with _decency_?” Yosuke’s voice holds no small amount of exasperation after they demolish the third group of shadows they encounter. The make-up on his face is starting to become muggy and he very badly wants to just wipe it all off. Ugh, why the hell did he agree to this in the first place?

“This is fun,” is all Souji has to offer on the subject, as if _that’s_ enough for this to happen at all. Which is dumb. This is dumb. Not that _Souji’s_ dumb but this whole situation is just-just really—

“Aw, c’mon, Yosuke!” Teddie bounces in front of him, waving that ridiculous claw of his in front of Yosuke’s face and almost threatening to scalp him. He wants to blame the near-miss on the fact that the blond hair extensions Teddie’s using is hanging over his face like that chick in The Grudge, but he figures Teddie might just act the same way even if he isn’t half-blind. “Sensei’s just trying to lighten the mood! It’s fun when you get into it!”

Ever the eager cross-dresser, Teddie seems to be. Yosuke had face-palmed hard when Teddie insisted on wearing the female version of their cheerleading range of outfits (even though Teddie looked pretty good in it, frustratingly enough)—and, by the way, _why_ is Souji spending their money on that sorta stuff? Not that Yosuke will confront him about this—because, hell, Souji really _does_ seem to be happy with this stuff, which makes everyone and Yosuke glad—, but shouldn’t they be spending that on weapons rather than clothes…?

With each passing day, Yosuke _swears_ he’s the only sane one in the group. Apart from Naoto, of course. She’s sweet, logical. So it kinda sucks that they hardly hang out as much as Souji and her seem to be doing recently. Maybe Yosuke should try to change that.

He’s distracted from his thoughts when a wave of stupid claws in his face brings him back to the situation at hand.

“Get that thing away from me before you take an eye out!” He snaps, batting Teddie away when he leans in _beary_ close— very. _Very_ close. Damn it.

Teddie gives out a fairly ear-piercing whine that only Yosuke seems to be annoyed by, "But Yooosukeeee!! We can be like those girls I saw on one of your movies! I bend over and yo—"

"Shut up, bear!" Yosuke immediately yells, feeling a flush shoot up his neck. He already knows where that sentence is going and damn it he _refuses_ to let Teddie blurt that kinda stuff out in front of everyone. Well, it would’ve been fine if it were in front of Souji, because they’ve both already sorta traded knowledge of each other’s ‘stashes’ but since Kanji _is sorta standing right there_ , Yosuke would _really_ rather not. Especially since Kanji likes to gossip to Rise. And Rise likes to gossip to everyone else in the group. Not a fun outcome.

Unfortunately, Kanji doesn't sense his freak-out and doesn’t seem to be letting the matter go any time soon. "Wow, you _really_ swing that way, huh?"

"Shut up!" Yosuke says again, shooting him a scowl. He doesn't wanna look at Souji right now—even though he can feel his stare boring into the side of his head—and instead chooses to grill Teddie. "Wh-where did you even find th-that movie, anyway? Didn't I tell you not to go through my stuff?!"

"Well, Teddie does have a point." When Yosuke looks at Souji the moment he speaks, he's horrified to see both a serious and _contemplative_ expression on his face. "We can always re-enact that video you have for fun."

"Oh, god." Yosuke covers his face when it burns harder than ever. "Please tell me you're joking."

"I’m gonna have to side with Yosuke-senpai on this one," Kanji says, and Yosuke starts to beam at him hopefully, starts to think that he _may_ have misjudged Kanji, until— "I'd rather be the guy than one of the girls. Someone's gotta be king of the harem, y'know?"

Yosuke’s hopes drop rapidly. "Oh you have _got_ to be kidding me," He groans. "Leave me now. Please. Just do it in that room if you're all serious about it." He gives a vague gesture behind them. He’s pretty sure there’s a dead-end there, complete with a door so they can all have some damn privacy. _And_ so that Yosuke won’t have to hear any traumatizing sounds.

Thinking about doing that sorta stuff with Kanji and Teddie makes him feel ill. With Souji, it could be fun— wait, no, what the _hell_ is he thinking? It won’t ( _Souji coiling a braid around his wrist, giving it—_ ) be fun at _all_ , it’ll be nasty (– _a firm tug as an indicator for Yosuke to pull when he starts to—_ fuck fuck, stop, fucking _stop_ ) and just downright _horrible_. No. _No_ to these thoughts. Just a huge, fat, goddamn _no_.

“Woah, you’re so red, Yosuke!” Teddie exclaims, and the damn bear has the nerve to poke a flaming cheek with his finger ( _thankfully_ not the equipped one; Yosuke doubts a member of their team maiming one of their own would contribute to finding that stupid statue) with the expression of a keenly interested scientist. “When you’re blushing, doesn’t that mean you secretly like the idea of something—?”

When will Teddie shut up? “I’m _not_ blushing! It’s the make-up, alright? You’re imagining things,” Yosuke interrupts shortly with a glare, and he waves the prodding hand away with his own once more. “C-can we just get on with this?” He’s painfully aware of the faint smirk that Souji seems to be holding in as well as the snickers that finally escape Kanji. Why can’t they just joke around about things that’re normal? N-not _gay_ things like this… ugh. Hasn’t he already made it clear he _really_ isn’t into this sorta stuff?

Then again, he _does_ have those movies (and comics and books) about lesbians… and lesbians are technically gay… well, they _are_ gay… Yosuke groans once more. Damn this. They’re just making fun of him, that’s all. He tries to convince himself of this—but then, why does he _need_ to? There’s no ulterior motive to their teasing, there’s no _suggestion_ to it at all. Why the hell is he getting so worked up about it?

“If you insist.” Souji seems to have trouble concealing his shit-eating grin and Yosuke wants to smack him in the arm for it. This is _his_ damn fault. And the blush rising up his cheeks is _definitely_ only the red tinting from the make-up.

“Shut up,” Yosuke huffs out; he crosses his arms and strides on ahead before any of the other three can continue teasing him.

Yeah. _Definitely_ going with the girls next time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alskjfjf i hope you guys enjoyed reading!! sorry it's super short hhhh i guesss the one before this one kinda took it all outta me plus i've been working a lot.
> 
> but but!!! i'm really floored at the amount of kudos and comments that have come in lkjsaf aaaaahhh i can't thank everyone enough for taking the time to leave them at all as well as taking the time to read this!! i really really really do appreciate it fff lkjasf 
> 
> p.s. this fic might be slowly updated bc i'm currently working on a super long one-shot. it's that obligatory reincarnation one-shot that i always do and lkjasf ugggh please look forward to it!!! i'm having fun writing it haha. 
> 
> anywho, have a good day/night, readers!!!


	8. hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yosuke wants to give Souji a high-five as an excuse to feel his hand. That's not weird at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why didn't i post this before

There’s just something really nice about Souji’s hands.

Yosuke initially notices it when they’re fighting—which would honestly be a bad time for the observations he’s making but Kanji’s got this, he’s sure—when Souji transfers his sword from one hand to another to summon one of his many Personae and while he’s done that a lot in the past, this is the one time Yosuke pauses to _really_ watch.

And he _has_ watched before—many times, actually, because Souji just looks so damn _cool_ summoning his Persona because how the hell does he manage to break the card with his bare hand? Granted, everyone else has their own style of summoning their Persona—with everyone (mostly Chie) commenting flatly that Yosuke’s was the most ridiculous considering the energy he spends on jumping around—but Souji’s is… _very_ cool. He’s wondered, briefly, whether Souji can cut his hand like that, but he figures that can’t be the case. Souji’s special, after all.

Still, that doesn’t kill his curiosity over the matter at all. Maybe he should try to see how Souji’s hand feels in a closer context…

 _Yeah, that’s not weird at all,_ his brain helpfully supplies, but Yosuke ignores it firmly.

“Hey, good job, partner!” Yosuke grins the moment the battle is over, and holds his hand up for a high five. Not the subtlest move, and it’s very brief, but it’ll do for now.

Souji smiles at him, and starts to move over but—

“Yooosssukkeee!!!”

A blonde blur zips before his vision and suddenly Teddie is leaping in, positively _sparkling_ with happiness as he dramatically steals the high-five.

Yosuke can only stare. Murderously.

“What the hell.” It’s not even a question.

Yosuke can _swear_ he can see sparkles just _shining_ around Teddie’s blatantly pleased face as he caws happily over whatever achievement the he’s taken.

“A high-five!” Teddie’s ridiculously loud about this, hands pressing to his cheeks in an almost-fluster. “My first ever one! That’s how you do it, right?” He does a little spin on the spot, and if Yosuke hadn’t been so irritated, he would’ve admired the flawless and fast execution of it.

Instead, Yosuke slowly brings a palm to his face, shoulders hunching in defeat.

“Sure. Whatever,” he grumbles, his voice muffled. His mood’s totally shot by Teddie’s idiocy, but he’s amused at the same time. Maybe that was a godsend, because he’s only high-fiving Souji just to feel his hand, and that interest in and of itself is weird as hell.

“Why’s Yosuke so sad?” Teddie finally seems to notice, and he’s completely confused about it. Yosuke doesn’t bother answering, and so hears Souji’s own response.

“I know what to do,” Souji says in that amused, calm tone of his, like he’s in big brother mode. “Hey, Teddie, high-five me.”

What? Yosuke cracks open an eye and peeks between two fingers. His vision’s limited, but he can already guess as to what Souji’s up to. Teddie’s confused, but he follows Souji’s instructions—happily so, the weirdo—and bounces on the balls of his feet in curiosity.

“What now, Sensei?”

“And noooowww…”

Yup, Yosuke guessed correctly. Souji’s got a mischievous grin on his face as he edges over to him, and honestly, Yosuke feels his heart melt a little before he jerks his mind back to reality.

Immediately flustering at his own embarrassment, he removes his hands automatically from his face as soon as Souji’s near and gives a half-hearted glare to both him and the hand that Souji holds out in front of him.

“Come on, Yosuke,” Souji gives a gentle smile that admittedly makes him fluster more. “I got the high-five back from Teddie, so we can do it now!”

Yosuke groans. “You’re such a kid sometimes,” he mutters sulkily, and ignores Teddie’s excited giggling from behind Souji. Honestly, though, Souji really _is_ a kid. Maybe that’s why he gets along so well with those children at the day-care and Nanako.

Still…

Souji waves his hand a little, silently beckoning with a brightening smile and that seals the deal.

A reluctant grin tugging at his own lips, Yosuke lifts his own hand up and high-fives him.

It’s short, sweet, but it’s enough to be certain of the coarseness and coolness of Souji’s hand, and how damn sweaty Yosuke’s own must’ve felt. He thinks he’s missed the mark a few inches to the right, but it’s still a high-five, it still sends a nice, resounding clap throughout the empty area of the dungeon they’re currently in.

And, well, it’s enough.

“L-let’s get back to the others now,” Yosuke mutters, shoving his hands into his pockets as soon as he can. He looks away when Souji shoots him a bemused smile, and sees Teddie bounce over to him with a call upon his lips.

“And we can give them all high-fives like what Sensei did!”

“Of course, Teddie.” Souji humours him with what Yosuke imagines to be that gentle smile again. That cute, nice, _amazing_ smile—

With a huff, Yosuke starts off without waiting for them, and tries to ignore the overjoyed laugh of Teddie as he—most likely—clings to Souji’s arm. Yosuke’s not jealous. He _swears_.

Ugh. He needs to stop thinking weird things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, the scrub. i am so sorry for the late (and rlly short) update but thanks so much for the comments and the kudos!!!!!!! hopefully ill get back into the fanfiction mode soon alkjsfj
> 
> anD ALSO. /ALSO/.
> 
> SPECIAL THANKS TO THE BAB ELIZABETH FOR DRAWING SUCH LOVELY ART FOR THIS FIC... the post can be found [here](http://eggchef.tumblr.com/post/139510965367/eggchefs-fic-recs-1-the-abcs-of-closet-case) lkjsaf bless her honestly.


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